The 15 Most Ridiculous Athlete Reality TV Appearances
As if Terrell Owens didn't get enough attention, he'll be one of the athletes appearing on The Superstars, beginning later this month. John Salley is also currently degrading himself on I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!
What is it about athletes that makes them want to go on reality television shows? It has to be the competition, right? A new way for them to prove that they are the best?
Sometimes it goes smoothly. For a six-year stretch, athletes have either won Dancing With the Stars or come in second. Players such as Emmitt Smith, Jerry Rice, and Jason Taylor have opened themselves up to a whole new fanbase.
But it's not always that successful. Most reality television is trashy, some is controversial, and some is just downright stupid.
Let's take a look back at The 15 Most Ridiculous Athlete Reality TV Appearances.
Jose Canseco—The Surreal Life
It's not every day that a person who had a much-publicized fling with Madonna and once put jet fuel into his Lamborghini is the most sane person in a houseful of people, but that is exactly what happened with Jose Canseco on The Surreal Life.
Canseco actually turned out to be somewhat of a prophet when it came to steroids in baseball. However, since he has no discernible skill other than playing baseball, he has destroyed any credibility he might have had by showing up on as many reality TV shows and publicity stunts as he can.
Go away, Jose. Your 15 minutes were up a long time ago.
Mark Philippoussis—Age of Love
For his foray into the world off the tennis court, Philippoussis decided to be the central figure in the show Age of Love. In it, he had to choose between six Kittens (women in their 20s) and seven Cougars (women in their 40s).
In the end, Philippoussis went with the hockey dance team Kitten over the executive assistant Cougar (I feel like I just got dumber typing that sentence), proving that love does indeed have an expiration date.
I'm not talking about age; I'm talking about how reality television relationships last for about 15 minutes after the show gets over with.
Christian Okoye—Pirate Master
The Nigerian Nightmare was only in the NFL for six years, but he had one rushing title and two Pro Bowl appearances. That short time was enough to land him sweet gigs on shows like Pros vs. Joes and Celebrity Boxing.
But Okoye's finest hour was on a show called Pirate Master. He only lasted until the second episode, where he was cut loose for being too slow. Okoye also left the show with only $200 in winnings.
The Pirate Master contestants must not have known what Okoye was capable of. If they had seen this video, they would have kept him around longer for sure.
Dennis Rodman—Celebrity Mole: Yucatan
Dennis Rodman is insane. As in, he's a crazy person. So naturally he tries to be on television as much as humanly possible.
The Worm has been on such highbrow shows as The Surreal Life, Celebrity Apprentice, U.K. Celebrity Big Brother, Geek to Freak, and has an upcoming stint on Celebrity Rehab. But it was in his role in Celebrity Mole that he had the most success.
Rodman won that competition because he was so naturally sketchy that everyone suspected him of being the mole himself.
Monica Seles—Dancing With the Stars
Sports fans all over the world were shocked when the former mousy tennis champ showed up on DWTS looking like this.
Seles said that she did the show because she was denied a normal childhood by tennis, and that she never got a chance to go to a prom.
As someone who has been to a prom, it is nothing like this show. If there was a show that was just a bunch of horny teenagers grinding on each other, that would give her the full experience.
Seles might have actually fared better on that show. She finished dead last on DWTS.
Barry Bonds—Bonds On Bonds
"Hey look guys, it's me, Barry Bonds. I'm dressing up in drag, isn't that fun? I'm actually a really fun-loving guy, not at all the jerk that the media has portrayed me to be.
"I love my teammates, and they love me. You can totally tell by watching my show. Trust me, you can't fake this stuff on television. If you see it, that means it must be true. So you should vote me into the Hall of Fame. I'm just saying.
"Guys? Is anybody watching anymore? Ah, screw it. I hate the world."
Herschel Walker—Celebrity Apprentice
Walker was a curious choice to go on Celebrity Apprentice considering he was never known for his intelligent business choices.
After winning the Heisman his junior year, he decided to jump to the USFL, which was defunct soon after, instead of waiting a year to go to the NFL. After that, he got downgraded to "the guy the Cowboys traded to get Emmitt Smith."
And even though he owns his own food company, Walker decided it would be a good idea to go on a reality television show, alongside such notable people as Tom Green.
Walker doesn't care. If you doubt him, then you can just "shet up."
John Salley—I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here
Salley is someone who has had a much more successful career after sports than during. Although he won four NBA Championships, he is most well known as one of the hosts from The Best Damn Sports Show Period.
He had dipped his toe into reality waters before, with Fast Car and Superstars, but this is by far the worst thing he has ever done. To my knowledge, I don't know why anyone would ever want to be stuck on an island with Speidi and Sanjaya.
Maybe Salley will have to eat one of them to stay alive...
Shaquille O'Neal—Shaq's Big Challenge
This should have been called The Biggest Loser: Kids Edition...with Shaq!
It actually was a pretty nice show, and helping morbidly obese kids get in shape is a worthwhile effort. But it was just too ironic to have Shaq host this show.
The Big Aristotle was known for coming into the season out of shape and overweight, which led to injuries. He's not exactly the ideal fitness role model.
Jesse Palmer—The Bachelor
I'm going to let the world know, right here and now, that I watch The Bachelor. Now, before other men start breaking out the torches and pitchforks, just think about what The Bachelor is.
It's a show where a bunch of crazy women fight and claw at each other while they all date the same man. Oh, and they're all good looking. And did I mention crazy? It's comedy at its highest.
Every time a woman leaves after two weeks and starts sobbing about how the guy could have been her soulmate...I can't stop laughing.
Career backup quarterback Jesse Palmer saw this and thought, "You know, this may not be a bad idea."
Eric Snow - The Real Housewives of Atlanta
The former Cav's captain wasn't on the show a lot, but that might be fitting considering his NBA career. He was never in the spotlight and always took a backseat to players like Iverson and LeBron.
He won't have many more chances, if any, to catch reality television lightning in a bottle. His wife was booted from Real Housewives for being "too nice." That's just unacceptable in reality TV world.
Eric should have started some major drama and kept that dream alive. That would have been a big assist right there.
Tito Ortiz - Celebrity Apprentice
When the two things you are known for are being married to a porn star and beating the crap out of people, it doesn't seem like you are going to have much of a future in the business world. But that's exactly what Tito set his sights on when he joined Celebrity Apprentice.
This only helped show what a badass Donald Trump was. Anybody that has the guts to fire Tito Ortiz is a man in my book.
That being said, Ortiz was only the second scariest contestant after Omarosa.
John Rocker - Pros vs. Joes
For someone who once drew the wrath of all of New York City, I would have expected Rocker to head to The Surreal Life or something, but all he did was find a spot on Pros vs. Joes where regular guys tried to get a hit off of him.
Rocker seemingly has this a-hole smirk plastered on his face at all times. It's no wonder that once he buzzed a pitch near one of the Joes' head too many times that they charged the mound to take him down.
Gabrielle Reece - Fast Cars and Superstars
Although Reece was one of the best vollyball players in the world for a while, it's safe to say that most men knew her for her outstanding work in a bikini. Or, if you picked up a Playboy in 2001, out of a bikini.
Reece brought her sexy athleticism to the race track in Fast Cars where she matched up against Bill Cower's chin and William Shatner's hairpiece.
Venus and Serena Williams - Venus and Serena: For Real
The Williams sisters decided to take the Barry Bonds approach to reality television by having a show all about them. Unless you are a crazy, stalker-like fan (which tennis has no shortage of, apparently) you were probably bored out of your mind.
Much of the show followed their attempts to train their dog, talk about Serena's modeling career, and following their busy schedule of working out. The show only lasted one six-episode season. America was not as enamored with the sisters as ABC Family thought.