You really learn something new every day. Turns out noted steroid cheat (well maybe not proven beyond a shadow of a doubt but come on, a friend of Angel Presinal is overwhelmingly likely a friend of needles) David "Big Pop-Up" Ortiz is not the man we thought he was. That's right, his name is really David Americo Ortiz Arias, and that has been confirmed by the fine folks at Wikipedia.
Very interested in why he decided to chop off the Arias and go with just Ortiz. Didn't sound Hispanic enough? Some father's name/mother's name stuff?
Either way, clearly I'm gonna be calling him Arias from now on and I encourage you all to do so too.