A Dream Transfer Deadline Scenario for Chelsea

Garry Hayes@@garryhayesFeatured ColumnistJanuary 31, 2014

A Dream Transfer Deadline Scenario for Chelsea

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    Sang Tan/Associated Press

    Here we go again. Brace yourselves. The countdown starts now.

    We're not talking about another weekend of thrilling action in the Premier League. No, this is something much more important. It's transfer deadline day!

    Chelsea have already dipped their toe in the market this January, signing Nemanja Matic and Mohamed Salah, while Michael Essien, Juan Mata and Kevin De Bruyne have all left the club for pastures new.

    But what will the next 24 hours involve? Will there be more coming and goings at Stamford Bridge? And what about Chelsea's rivals?

    With tongue firmly in cheek, Bleacher Report maps out a dream transfer deadline day for the Blues.

Sergio Aguero Leaves Manchester City

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    Jon Super/Associated Press

    What a season Sergio Aguero is having. He already has 26 goals to his name in all competitions, and he has scored in all but six of the games he has played in this term despite injuries.

    Tottenham Hotspur were on the receiving end this week when the Argentine set City on their way to a 5-1 victory, although he later hobbled off with a hamstring injury.

    That means he is in doubt for Chelsea's trip north this coming Monday.

    In the short term, that may allow Jose Mourinho to breathe a sigh of relief, but it doesn't mean he will not play a significant part in the next few months of the season when every goal and every point will be vital.

    A move away from City would help, of course. A move anywhere for Aguero could prove just as vital as any signings Chelsea make, in fact.

    It's a tantalizing prospect, but then again, City would still have Alvaro Negredo, Edin Dzeko and Stevan Jovetic to pick from up front.

Wayne Rooney Joins from Manchester United

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    Jon Super/Associated Press/Associated Press

    Manchester United have managed to poach one of Chelsea's best players this January, so why shouldn't the Blues try doing the same?

    Oh, wait, they already did when they pursued Wayne Rooney for much of last summer only to be told that "no" actually does mean "no" at Old Trafford.

    With one day remaining of the winter transfer window, though, could Jose Mourinho pull off the seemingly impossible and sign Rooney?

    Just as United fans feel things are going in the right direction with the arrival of Juan Mata, it would be a significant blow to morale.

    It would boost Chelsea to no end, though, giving them a proven goalscorer to help get their title challenge back on the right foot after a goalless draw with West Ham United midweek—a game that saw them have 39 shots on goal without scoring.

    They've pulled off some unexpected deals on transfer deadline day before, but even by Chelsea's standards this would be a remarkable deal.

Someone, Anyone Takes John Obi Mikel off Chelsea's Hands

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    Kirsty Wigglesworth/Associated Press

    We're not sure what was more painful at Stamford Bridge on Wednesday night—John Obi Mikel's performance or when Mohamed Diame stacked it into the Matthew Harding Lower, flying over the advertising screens and into the onlooking fans.

    Both were equally unnerving, although we're pretty sure what was more concerning for Chelsea supporters.

    Mikel didn't have much to do defensively on account of what Mourinho called Sam Allardyce's "19th century football" in a press conference after the match, but it still meant he was pretty worthless in attack for the Blues.

    With the Hammers camped in their own half for much of the game, Chelsea needed to move the ball at pace, unsettle the defenders and pull players out of position.

    Instead, whenever Mikel was in possession, time seemed to stop. The Nigerian was far too relaxed, playing with little energy and desire to break West Ham down. And when he did find a teammate, it was often the wrong player at the wrong time.

    It's not a game in isolation, though. The 26-year-old has been that way since joining from Lyn Oslo in 2006.

    Quite what Chelsea and Manchester United got in a squabble over when competing for his signature back then, we'll never know.

    A similar bidding war now would do Chelsea a massive favor.

Chelsea Pinch Yet Another Player from the Clutches of a Rival

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    Sang Tan/Associated Press

    Chelsea fans are known for having a sense of humor, so we couldn't resist playing up to it by hoping the Blues pinch another transfer target off one of their rivals.

    It's becoming almost a tradition at Stamford Bridge.

    By the end of the year, the term "Willian'd" should enter the Oxford English Dictionary if Chelsea continue with their current transfer strategy.

    It was Tottenham Hotspur who missed out on the signature of Willian last summer when Chelsea made a late bid for the Brazilian, despite his move from Anzhi Makhachkala being all but done. Chelsea then did the same to Liverpool last week, pinching FC Basel's Mohamed Salah from their grasp.

    Their financial muscle allows Chelsea to bully their rivals somewhat, and while they wouldn't be too happy themselves were it to happen to their club, Blues fans are reveling in it.

    Willian is a West London hero on the back of his Spurs snub, and we imagine Salah will be taking on a similar status when he makes his debut.

    Now Chelsea just need to target another suitable transfer to sabotage. They have 24 hours with which to do it.

    Garry Hayes is Bleacher Report's lead Chelsea correspondent and will be following the club from a London base throughout the 2013-14 season. Follow him on Twitter here @garryhayes