Detroit Lions Try To Send Daunte Culpepper Down To Minors (Satire)

The Sports Comedian by Analyst Written on June 06, 2009
DETROIT - DECEMBER 07:  Quarterback Daunte Culpepper #11 of the Detroit Lions picks himself up against the Minnesoa Vikings during the NFL game at Ford Field on December 7, 2008 in Detroit, Michigan.  The Vikings defeated the Lions 20-16.  (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images) (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images)

The Detroit Lions today announced that veteran quarterback Daunte Culpepper has been designated for minor league assignment today. This leaves the starting job open for the taking by overall No. 1 pick Matthew Stafford. The move is a strange one, considering there is not currently nor has there ever been a minor league system in the NFL.

"What? We don't have a minor league system?" said team president Tom Lewand. "Look, I obviously don't know all that much about football from the results you've seen on the field here. But, when we told Culpepper we were sending him to the minors he just left and went somewhere. We're not sure exactly where he went to, but he's not with our team anymore, and that's the important thing."

Indeed, Culpepper's whereabouts are currently unknown. Authorities have begun searching small towns in the Detroit area in an attempt to find him, as they believe he could be wandering the streets looking for a minor league franchise. They believe they will find him in no time, they just have to follow the interceptions.

 

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written on June 06, 2009 Humor

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