My dunk contest, my rules.
So much for having a bunch of non-household names competing for the trophy. So much for only having a few contestants in the early stages. So much for LeBron James getting to spectate rather than throw down.
This is my world now, and that's going to make the upcoming competition into the Ultimate 2014 Dunk Contest. You can thank me later.
But for now, let's think about the ridiculous number of epic dunks we're going to see.
I don't care what your favorite historical dunk contest is, because this one's going to be better. With the perfect mix of challengers and athletic superstars, you're sure to be as entertained as you've ever been while watching basketball.
There's only one rule that keeps the excitement level a little bit down: We can't bring in any injured players, only ones who will be ready to compete when it's time to travel to New Orleans. If we could magically heal injuries, what's to stop us from creating a time machine and inviting the great retired dunkers into the contest?
That's just a rabbit hole we don't want to travel down right now.
Derrick Rose, Russell Westbrook and Eric Bledsoe would be mortal locks for the field if all of their body parts worked properly, but sadly, that's not the case. Jeff Taylor would be a strong candidate as well, but his Achilles isn't intact.
Swallow your tears, because now it's time to introduce the 12-man field, with one major twist.
Note: All information about players' height and weight comes from ESPN.