The Boston Bruins vs. the Montreal Canadiens: A Trying Game Seven

CBC’s fast fact—the Montreal Canadiens are 2/29 on the powerplay during the series. This is made relevant by the fact that Mark Stuart just took a penalty—I wonder if Claude Julien is mad?

7:41: Note to all American readers—there’s an upcoming CFL reference: David Boston is coming to the CFL! Just another castoff NFL receiver that the Argos will put up with an average showing from for a season-and-a-half and then release. The good news is he hasn’t caught a pass in two years! I love Toronto Sports.

In other news: The first period is over. 1-0 Canadiens.

7:47: Don Cherry’s annual playoff rant: GRINDERS WIN GAMES!!! Complete with highlights from Calgary’s last game, I think I know who he wants to win game 7—although he seems to think that San Jose was just “waiting” to get to game seven. Kind of like Eddie Murphy was just “waiting” for pre-op transsexual Atisone Seiuli.

Something I didn’t know: Eddie Murphy released a song called Put Your Mouth on Me. I’m not sure how to feel anymore.

7:50: Reasons why Don Cherry is anti-Montreal: He coached in Boston, he was the fastest coach to 250 wins, he had an insane winning percentage, four first place titles, and many other reasons. Some of these may be wrong as he talks way too fas for me to type, but I think we can all take solace in the fact he just didn’t start bashing French people…yet.

7:57: Chris Higgins forgoes the “emotional speech in between periods” and instead answers a few questions for Elliot Friedman.

I have a question though: Do the coaches actually plan around the between-period interviews and then time their speeches accordingly, or do they just go ahead with them?

Maybe Higgins just missed the “be-all, end-all strategy on how to defeat the Bruins". Or maybe Guy Carboneau just re-tied his favorite tie. We’ll never know.

8:02: The most eventful thing that came across the airwave since the second period started is that Glen Murray isn’t on the Boston bench to start the period. Somewhere Sean Crowe just wept into his pillow.

8:07: Washington is losing 2-0. It’s been 4:20 in the second period of this game, and nothing has happened. No one has even done any hitting—which is probably the reason we’re considering renting Grindhouse right about now.

8:09: That’s it—I’ve given in. Bianca is telling me “who the stick to her candy apple is” by lurking photos on Facebook. There are two things wrong with that sentence: 1) I just used the word “lurking” which has become way overused since things like MySpace and Facebook came to fruition—which account for seven of the top-ten reasons why the Internet is the devil, and 2) I just realized that of the 14 hours I’ve been at the school, I’ve been on Facebook for 12 hours. I suddenly feel like that single, 40-year old guy with binoculars that lives in that house on the corner of your street.

For some reason I want to rent 40-Year-Old Virgin

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