Before Carson Daly taught Earl about karma, I learned its power when Cunningham’s Vikings inexplicably blew the NFC Championship game in 1998. (Why did Robert Smith keep running out of bounds? WHY!?)
I’m still married to the Eagles. We’re not the same though. She’s never really willing to go where I want to go. There have been promises of trips somewhere warm in January, but those usually end at least one week before. And the one time we did go, she threw up.
The offense isn’t excited as it was before we were married. There was that time she added Terrell Owens, but I had to pay for it the whole next year while being forced to stomach Greg Lewis and Reggie Brown and two years later she gave me Donte Stallworth. Was that supposed to make everything OK?
Like every marriage, money is always an issue too. How many players with whom I have lived and died with do I have to see in another jersey?
Owens, Jevon Kearse, Jeremiah Trotter, Troy Vincent, Bobby Taylor, Ike Reese, Hugh Douglas… I’m sure I’m leaving someone out.
This year it is Brian Dawkins. How can I not root for B-Dawk in 2009?
It’s always about money and that budget we have to stick to. Why can’t we just splurge just once and go where I want to go in January or February?
But I still root. I’m still an E-A-G-L-E-S Eagles fan. No matter how many times they get close enough that another loss will rip my heart out, midnight green is the color of the bloody puddle you’ll find me in after the season ends in disappointment again.
What? My closet? Why are you going through my closet?
I don’t know how that powder blue LaDainian Tomlinson Chargers jersey got in my closet. I swear!
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