Kansas City Royals

Zack Greinke: Unknown Pleasures and Substituting Allegory for Superlatives

ANAHEIM, CA - MAY 09:  Pitcher Zack Greinke #23 of the Kansas City Royals throws a pitch against the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim on May 9, 2009 at Angel Stadium in Anaheim, California. The Angels won 1-0.  (Photo by Stephen Dunn/Getty Images)
Josh DugganCorrespondent IMay 28, 2009

Honestly, it is getting pretty hard to write about what Zack Greinke is doing. Each game, he keeps raising the bar. To see an earned run scored off Zack is shocking, frankly. When he steps to the mound, regardless of how inept the Royals offense (or even the defense) is, it seems like all is right in the world.

The echelon to which Zack Greinke is ascending is tantalizing.

The long-dormant desires that Royals fans are becoming reacquainted with every fifth day could be likened to a person afflicted with Alzheimer's suddenly being rid of the memory loss altogether. After years of persevering the malaise of confusion and loss caused by Royals fandom, a beacon of clarity not only breaks through but tears us from the chains that bind us, freeing us to enjoy sports as so many others have gotten to in this long drought.

Immediately after Zack Greinke sates the success-starved Royals fan, the drought begins again. The fans are left to weather the storm that follows, hoping that someone, anyone, can provide us with that taste that we need.

To conflate this allegory with metaphor, Zack Greinke is our heroin, and the four days of withdrawal between fixes can be trying to say the least. Over these past few weeks, the symptoms of withdrawal have been getting increasingly ugly.

Where can I comment?

Stay on your game

Latest news, insights, and forecasts on your teams across leagues.

Choose Teams
Get it on the App StoreGet it on Google Play

Real-time news for your teams right on your mobile device.

Download
Copyright © 2017 Bleacher Report, Inc. Turner Broadcasting System, Inc. All Rights Reserved. BleacherReport.com is part of Bleacher Report – Turner Sports Network, part of the Turner Sports and Entertainment Network. Certain photos copyright © 2017 Getty Images. Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Getty Images is strictly prohibited. AdChoices