College Football 2013 Week 8 Simulation
NCAA Football 14 did a serviceable job navigating upset waters in Week 7, finishing off an eventful weekend with a 3-2 record. Not bad, but we expect more out of the world’s most intelligent simulation device.
We will likely get those anticipated results in a matchup-friendly Week 8. Better yet, we demand it.
For those new to these parts, here’s the rundown: Using the video game NCAA Football 14, all games from the college football weekend are simulated. These results are not doctored in any shape or form, and the recordings are posted here (and they are usually correct).
A reminder: This game has magical powers and often showcases the unique ability to pick games better than most humans. Don't be alarmed, just accept it.
Updated Record Through Week 7: 23-12
Notre Dame 27, USC 24 (OT)
Yes, the rivalry game is down in 2013, but it still warrants a spot in the simulation spotlight. And in this spotlight, USC turns the ball over four times—including once in overtime—and that proves to be the difference.
Notre Dame quarterback Tommy Rees is, well, bad. He completes only 11 of 32 passes—yikes—for 110 yards. BUT Rees does find the end zone on three of these completions, which is perhaps the strangest stat line I can remember.
Multiple USC quarterbacks see the field in this game, and they exhibit the good and the bad. The good is the 245 yards passing and three touchdowns. The bad is the four interceptions (including the one in overtime).
It would appear that Lane Kiffin’s hot seat has just gotten hotter!
[Editor runs over and whispers tidbit in ear]
Oh, scratch that. Yeah.
Florida 35, Missouri 26
Undefeated Missouri—which really does have a fascinating ring to it—finally suffers its first loss. The Gators mount a huge comeback late and cruise in the fourth quarter.
Florida racks up more than 500 yards of offense, and please stop laughing this is serious. Gator running backs rack up 267 yards rushing on 35 carries, and they find the end zone four times.
Missouri’s offense struggles a bit against one of the nation’s best defenses, although that doesn’t stop wideout Dorial Green-Beckham. Beckham catches six balls for 115 yards and scores twice on two deep passes.
Florida coach Will Muschamp is so excited he almost doesn’t eat his microphone in the postgame. Almost is the key word here, as he still eats it and a reporter’s notepad.
LSU 38, Ole Miss 34
Both teams finish with exactly 483 yards of offense, which is strange, but also somewhat awesome. LSU, however, wins it with a monster performance on the ground.
Running back Jeremy Hill goes berserk for the Tigers. Hill rushes for 217 yards on 26 carries and scores two touchdowns. Quarterback Zach Mettenberger is also solid, throwing for 175 yards and three scores.
Bo Wallace has a monster game for Ole Miss in a losing effort. The Rebels QB throws for 335 yards and four scores. Two of these scores go to wideout Donte Moncrief, who finishes with eight catches for 167 yards.
Following the game, Les Miles decides to lecture the media on the origins of Halloween and his favorite costume of all time. He wears that costume to the press conference, of course, only adding to its YouTube charm.
UCLA 45, Stanford 24
UCLA returns two of the first six Stanford passes for touchdowns, and the 14-0 lead sets the tone for the entire game.
Brett Hundley enters the Heisman discussion by throwing for 255 yards, running for 66 and scoring three touchdowns for the Bruins in the win. UCLA backs also combine to rush for 155 yards on 27 carries.
Stanford quarterback Kevin Hogan struggles, throwing for only 210 yards and two interceptions. He does, however, find the end zone twice. Running back Tyler Gaffney runs for 108 yards on 17 carries.
Hello, undefeated UCLA-Oregon matchup. Hello indeed.
Clemson 13, Florida State 10
The shootout many expected…doesn’t exactly turn out to be a shootout at all. In fact, Florida State’s lone touchdown comes from the defense.
Tajh Boyd plays a solid game for the Tigers, throwing for more than 260 yards. He hooks up with Sammy Watkins on a touchdown, the lone score in the game. Running back Roderick McDowell runs for 80 yards on 17 carries.
For Florida State, Jameis “Video Game Numbers” Winston—a nickname I just made up—does not live up to it here. Winston throws for just 189 yards and is held out of the end zone. He also adds two interceptions.
Which quarterback comes away victorious in this Heisman battle? That’s easy.
(Marcus Mariota, still).
Iowa 33, Ohio State 32 - Well, sure. Just like you predicted.
Oregon 42, Washington State 23
Boise State 40, Nevada 21
Louisville 41, UCF 27
Arizona State 28, Washington 24
Minnesota 41, Northwestern 24 - Clearly the Big Ten set its filter to "drunk" before the weekend.
Michigan State 28, Purdue 25
Michigan 31, Indiana 14
Georgia 35, Vanderbilt 28
Texas A&M 38, Auburn 20
Miami 23, North Carolina 22
Baylor 30, Iowa State 13 - Perhaps this simulation simply froze at halftime?
Illinois 28, Wisconsin 19
Texas Tech 14, West Virginia 6
Utah 23, Arizona 21
Oregon State 45, Cal 31
TCU 41, Oklahoma State 31
Alabama 41, Arkansas 17 - This is shocking. Not the win, but the whole scored-17-points thing.
Oklahoma 49, Kansas 21