Michael Vick Is Free. Does Anyone Know Where Jerry Jones Is?

Analyst Written on May 20, 2009

RICHMOND, VA - AUGUST 27: Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick (R) leaves federal court August 27, 2007 in Richmond, Viriginia. Vick pleaded guilty to a federal dogfighting charge. (Photo by Steve Helber-Pool/Getty Images)

(Photo by Steve Helber-Pool/Getty Images)

Has anybody seen Jerry Jones?

Somebody call his son Stephen! Call Wade Phillips! Call Jason Garrett! Call Ed Werder!

With news of Michael Vick's release, Jerry could be in a potentially self-destructive (and franchise-destructive) mental state right now. The Cowboys haven't signed a ex-con or locker-room cancer yet this offseason, and Mr. Jones could be desperate.

Jerry has already hinted that Dallas will be toying with the Wildcat formation this off-season, so he could be on his private jet heading for Kansas to sweep Vick off of his prison-issued slippers.

With Terrell Owens in Buffalo, Pacman Jones on Pros vs. Joes, and the Bengals on Hard Knocks, the only consistent publicity the Cowboys will receive outside of Dallas-Fort Worth will be in the gossip magazines that Tonessica dominate.

How will ESPN keep their Cowboys beat writers in town unless Jerry acts quick?

Of course, Jerry has probably convinced himself that Vick got a bad rap. He could repair his image with Calvin Hill (Cowboys assistant) and redeem the last few questionable signings by Jones.

More than likely though, Jerry Jones knows the Cowboys season will be a dog-fight.

Michael Vick would be just the man for that job.

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written on May 20, 2009 Humor

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