Good day and welcome to The Onion, B/R's bi-weekly look at the weird and wonderful world of football!
Today, we kick off with the Italian John Rambo: A Genoa youth coach who stands accused of secretly spying on a Sampdoria training session dressed in full military attire.
Next, it's the Manchester City fan who is getting a Manchester Utd tattoo—in the name of charity.
From there, we consider the selflessness of Barcelona's Dani Alves, who offered former teammate Eric Abidal part of his liver when he needed a transplant.
And finally, we offer a debate: Should divers be shown a straight red card? As Ashley Young earns another yellow for simulation, we ask whether the attackers who pretend to create goalscoring opportunities should receive the same punishment as those defenders who prevent them.
Have your say on that debate and the rest of the show below, and strike up a conversation with Ryan Bailey on Twitter.