Fourteen Ways America is Killing My Hockey Buzz

Tyler NasmithContributor IMay 14, 2009

WASHINGTON - MAY 04:  General view of the on ice display of an American Flag during the National Anthem prior to the start of a NHL game between the Washington Capitals and the Pittsburgh Penguins during Game Two of the Eastern Conference Semifinal Round of the 2009 Stanley Cup Playoffs on May 4, 2009 at the Verizon Center in Washington,  DC.  (Photo by Len Redkoles/Getty Images)

In no particular order.

1. U.S. arena scheduling: Yanni likes

2. Versus telecasts: unwatchable 

3. ESPN: hockey-haters

4. Bettman: anti-Canadian

5. Atlanta and Nashville fans: clueless

6. Jack Edwards: jack-ass

7. All other FSN announcers: uber-homers

8. Florida (GO Gators!)

9. Tennesse (GO Vols!)

10. Arizona (GO Cats!)

11. Georgia (GO Tech!) 

12. Callers to NHL Live: oxygen-deprived

13. Barry Melrose: star-struck

14. Wayne Gretzky: sun-stroked

That is all.