Horrible tackles, pickup trucks and heckling fans lead our list of things that are absolutely awful this week.
Alex Rodriguez, you can take a few days off.
We have a bumper crop of knuckleheaded nonsense to talk about. Yes, you can bet there will be a brief detour with some Johnny Manziel mania.
With that, we bring you to another rousing edition of things that are annoying and quite reprehensible in sports.
From the things that are hilariously bad to stuff that will actually cause you to fume, we have you covered.
Of course, we need your help to debate and properly chide these people in the comments section below.
Matt Yoder of Awful Announcing spotted this video of a South African sports show kicking off its coverage with one amazingly awkward segment.
Everything you want in a gigantic broadcast fail is here. There are long bouts of uncomfortable silence, audible discussion from behind the camera and cricket.
Sadly, the cricket may have been intentional.
The Hollywood Reporter reports Hermes is reopening a remodeled Beverly Hills store and celebrating that fact by selling a $12,900 basketball.
No, this isn't some fake story from The Onion, and the ball doesn't take the powers of NBA stars like in Space Jam.
It's merely a spherical object made of leather, and they are selling it for nearly $13,000 while keeping a straight face.
In case you want a backup ball, they are selling two.
Jérémy Jurkiewicz nearly completed 70.3 miles in an Ironman competition and decided to take the few steps before the finish line to gloat.
Brazilian Igor Amorelli sees this and goes into an all-out sprint. Karma was taking a day off because Jurkiewicz notices just in time to win.
Maybe you wait to do your human airplane impersonation until you actually complete the race.
As multiple outlets reported this week, Johnny Manziel will miss the first half of the first game of the season because of an "inadvertent violation." This is essentially like your parents sending you to go play video games in your room as punishment.
The reigning Heisman winner now gets to kick his feet up and chill in a game that should be well in hand for the Aggies by the half.
And really, this isn't to call Manziel annoying, nor the incessant ongoing coverage that would even make picking out a fake story about him impossible.
No the fact that you can suspend somebody for half of a game just seems ridiculous. I wonder how close he was to sitting out three quarters.
The world may never know.
Earmuffs, because this video does have one NSFW F-bomb.
BuzzFeed spotted this video of two golfers getting into an argument at Elk Point Golf and Country Club in Alberta, Canada.
It all ends with a knockout punch and the sight of one man immediately regretting his decision. When the fellow on the ground wakes up, let him know his pugilistic golfing buddy said he was sorry.
That should take some of the sting away.
The upside here is we can at least confirm this soccer player didn't flop.
We take you to an exciting Brisbane Premier League match between Brisbane Wolves FC and Peninsula Power FC.
In the middle of the game, a WWE bout broke out and one player inadvertently—we think—clotheslined his opponent.
That's one way to go about it.
Fans are an integral part of sports. However, sometimes they can be the absolute worst.
While unable to confirm what exactly was said, comments in the Deadspin report shed some light on the story. Allegedly, Sen's mother died recently, and fans were using that as ammo to launch in his direction.
Stay classy, people.
You really have to feel for all involved in this one.
According to Peter Wallner of the Grand Rapids Press, Grand Valley State's Isiah Dunning will have to sit four to six weeks nursing a dislocated shoulder after he was hit by a truck driven by his own teammate.
The entire thing was a horrible and unfortunate accident, as his teammate was merely trying to get out of the way of an oncoming car and hit Dunning while driving five miles per hour.
And we thought MLB had the monopoly on weird injuries.