Justin Bieber's friends are taller, richer and block more shots than yours.
Following what we can only assume was a long, hard day's work, the Biebs posted a photo to his Instagram account of him chillaxing with his bros. And apparently his bros include (h/t Beyond the Buzzer) the Tyson Chandler and Kevin Durant. Carl Lentz was there, too.
"Chillin with the boys at home...Kevin Durant, Tyson Chandler and Carl Lentz," the caption read.
Nothing like doing some serious name-dropping, eh Biebs?
In my never-ending attempt to promote pop-culture conspiracy theories, I firmly believe the star musician meant to list his visitors in order of who has the most Twitter followers.
I should know. First thing I do when I meet up with some friends is take a picture and post it on social media with my exact location so people know who I'm with and where I'm at. Oh, that's right—I don't.
Blatant "look at me" aside by their host, they all look like they're having a jolly good time in each other's company...except Durant. Not sure if he's going for the debonair, brooding look or if he's just upset because Bieber has yet to serenade his guests with his latest rendition of anything.
Or maybe he's simply tired. Earlier in the day, he was spotted working out with Kevin Love and Charlie Villanueva at the Los Angeles Lakers training facility, so he wasn't doing his best couch-potato impression before attending this party.
Happy to be there or not, Durant and Chandler (and Lentz) were certainly overdressed for this gathering.
Their first mistake was wearing shirts. Bieber went all natural from the waist up. Had Chandler and Durant perused Bieber's Instagram before their meet-up, they would have known shirts of all kind are a hindrance.
Their second mistake was not wearing their shorts so low we could read their underwear label. That's one opportunity they'll never get back.
Like most of you, I'll admit I'm also wondering how the rest of this night played out. Did it end with cannon balls in Bieber's pool? Chandler and Durant singing Nicki Minaj's part in "Beauty and a Beat"? Bieber turning this into his personal photo opp?
The possibilities are endless. But before you allow yourself to become bowled-over with envy, just know there's no reason to feel left out. From the looks of it, neither Love nor Villanueva got an invite either.
Instead, be happy that Bieber doesn't have to spend his summer nights alone. And also that he wasn't going commando.