Here it is, everyone—the first martial arts demonstration to ever make grown men laugh and children run away in tears.
A Scottish taekwondo instructor recently attempted to put on a clinic for a group of young martial arts enthusiasts. The demonstration quickly devolved into a scene of futility, however, and the results were busted knuckles, tears and an increasingly awkward video of a man being defeated by a piece of wood.
The video begins with the instructor attempting—and failing—to punch through a wooden board. No big deal. Wooden boards, by nature, aren’t particularly easy to destroy with your bare hands. Even the pros mess up, and the crowd is willing to grant the man a mulligan.
Problems begin soon after, however, as the sensei fails with his second and third punches. His fist sounds like a Beanie Baby hitting drywall, and the blows are doing more damage to his ego than to the board's surface.
Children watch as the struggle continues, and things take a dive into the Sea of Sadness after the instructor attempts a forward high kick. The blow barely touches the board, and his Keds paw feebly against the wood on the near miss.
Something is wrong here, and the instructor decides the problem is obvious—his power is uncontainable, and he needs more people to hold the board.
Two men grab the board, another kick is delivered and—huzzah!—a chip of wood splinters and goes flying directly into a young girl’s face. At this point even the local livestock were probably staring in disbelief.
Image via 4GIFs.com
The girl begins crying and walks off camera followed by her instructor. Surely, at this point, the instructor will end the demonstration and walk away, right?
The instructor continues, failing on several more kicks and hitting one of his volunteer’s hands in the process.
Sometimes it’s best to quit when you’re behind.
Join me on Twitter, where this man certainly states his case and gets a Web Redemption.