20 Worst Tackles of the Season in GIFs
Nothing is uglier about the beautiful game than terrible tackles. When you see a horror challenge in a match, you sometimes can't believe what has just happened.
This makes the format of animated GIFs even more useful. A terrible tackle in a GIF is a dare to yourself: How long can you keep watching a horrific tackle being played on an infinite loop before you have to look away?
We're ranking the most stomach-turning tackles of the 2012-13 season, the ones that would make Nigel de Jong look like he's seen a ghost, in order of the severity of the challenge, and then we are giving them to you in all of the guts and gore of a GIF.
Warning: The following slides contain potentially graphic scenes.
20. Ryan Koolwijk
In a bad-tempered Eredivisie game between NEC and Vitesse in November, NEC had three men sent off.
The worst of the bunch was the third dismissal for Ryan Koolwijk’s straight red for trying to break down a man’s legs like he’s a one-man squad of armed police trying to bust through a drug lord's door.
19. Emmanuel Adebayor
If Tottenham Hotspur's Emmanuel Adebayor's lunge against his former club's star man, Santi Cazorla, had gone differently, they would both need a hip replacement.
Adebayor was sent off for this North London November naughtiness in the 5-2 thriller.
18. Nelson Ibanez
- For preventing a goalscoring opportunity
- For deliberate handball outside of his area
- For trying to turn the player’s knee inside out.
Godoy Cruz’s goalkeeper, Nelson Ibanez, could have been given three red cards for this assault on Racing Club’s Luciano Vietto.
17. Matty Taylor
As if trying to kick Liverpool's Raheem Sterling in the intestines wasn’t dangerous enough, West Ham United’s Matty Taylor pushed him to the ground afterwards for good measure.
If this was WWE, they'd give Taylor a championship belt.
But it's football, so he got a yellow card. Just a yellow card.
16. Craig Gardner
Sunderland's Craig Gardner was given a straight red in May for this challenge that was incredibly mistimed.
Surprisingly, it's clumsy tackler Hall of Famer Charlie Adam who is on the receiving end of this tackle*.
*By "tackle," we mean "attempt to make a shin smoothie."
15. Paolo Guerrero
This is the most unnecessary foul in world football history. It was committed by Hamburg striker Paolo Guerrero (strikers have no place committing tackles) on Stuttgart goalkeeper Sven Ulreich (goalkeepers have no place being tackled), and the ball was out of player when he actually went through, studs up, on the 'keeper.
Guerrero was given an eight-match ban for this Paris Hilton level of stupidity.
14. Luis Suarez
He wasn’t anywhere near the ball!
You might argue that, strictly speaking, it wasn’t a challenge, but have you ever tried eating a live Serbian before?
It’s very challenging.
13. Ciaran Clark
There was nothing friendly about Ciaran Clark's challenge in the international friendly between Republic of Ireland and Greece in the European bailout derby in November.
It was only given a yellow, despite Clark being closer to the balls in the merchandise stalls outside the ground than he was to the ball on the pitch.
12. Diego Braghieri
In a Copa Libertadores match between Arsenal de Sarandi and Atletico Mineiro, Arsenal’s Diego Braghieri had somewhere he wanted to be.
And he wasn’t going to let anything stop him.
Not even Ronaldinho’s leg.
11. Sergio Aguero
You have to give it to Manchester City's Sergio Aguero for originality. We don’t think we’ve ever seen a two-footed challenge on a player’s backside before.
An injury to the buttocks can be a serious thing, especially for someone like Chelsea's David Luiz who falls over so much.
10. Yaseen Nogri
Here at Bleacher Report, we admit we’re guilty of neglecting Saudi Arabian football at times.
However, we and the rest of the football (and leg-owning) world took notice when Alta’awon’s Yaseen Nogri made a challenge on Al Shoala’s Yahya Kabi that could have crippled RoboCop.
9. Jobi McAnuff
On September 29, 2011, Arsenal's Jack Wilshere became a father.
However, after this challenge from Reading's Jobi McAnuff, the chance of Jack's son, Archie, having any siblings has been severely reduced.
8. Antonio Barragan
Drinking a bottle of whiskey while operating a threading machine is less reckless than Valencia's Antonio Barragan's juggernaut-like challenge on Bayern Munich's David Alaba.
Barragan was sent off for bulldozing Alaba in their Champions League clash in November. Alaba finally fell back to earth in March.
7. Gary Thom
Stirling Albion's Gary Thom decided to give tough-tackling Rangers midfielder Ian Black a lesson on what a tough tackle really is.
In fact, it would probably give Jean-Claude Van Damme a lesson on what a tough tackle really is.
6. Glenn Whelan
Manchester City's Javi Garcia has two feet.
But that isn't due to lack of trying by Stoke City's Glenn Whelan, who ran and jumped with both feet on Garcia's ankle.
Whelan went unpunished for using Javi Garcia's leg as a trampoline.
5. Cheik Tiote
Here Newcastle United’s Cheik Tiote tries his best at some simple division with the help of Manchester United's Tom Cleverley by trying to divide one person’s leg into two.
4. Taras Stepanenko
Taras Stepanenko performs all of his own stunts.
Even this flying kick straight from the outtakes of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon on a Moldovan defender's neck in a match between Ukraine and Moldova in March.
Stepanenko, who plays his club football at Shakhtar Donetsk, was given a straight red card for this for some reason.
3. Callum McManaman
Wigan Athletic chairman Dave Whelan called this attempted amputation of Newcastle United’s Massadio Haidara by Callum McManaman a “fair" challenge.
We assume under that logic he would class the “Finish him!” end to a bout in the computer game Mortal Kombat where one combatant rips another’s head off and throws it on the floor as a "bit of good-natured horseplay."
2. Valentin Eysseric
Nice’s Valentin Eysseric is still serving an 11-match ban for this Michael Myers-style challenge on St. Etienne’s Jeremy Clement.
You won’t be surprised to find out that this challenge broke Clement’s leg.
1. Gary Medel
This disgusting, hate-fueled horror challenge by Sevilla’s Gary Medel has ended this young plastic chair’s career.
Medel had no intention of getting the ball. He went to injure the player (the player being a chair in this case), and he did just that. There's no room in the game for scenes like this.
Some might say that a piece of cheap-looking garden furniture had no right being on a football pitch, but that does not excuse Medel’s vicious assault.
All of us are sending our thoughts to the chair, but chances are, it may never walk again.