WWE Worst of the Week: Ryback, Stephanie McMahon and More
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.
The creepy Wyatt Family are almost upon us, the daredevil Rob Van Dam is getting ready to return and the vomit-inducing McMahons have overstayed their welcome.
Overall though, WWE was pretty solid this week. SmackDown in particular was a good night of wrestling fun. So a skeptic might believe that there really isn't anything to complain about.
Time to shatter that myth!
That's what this article is for, to search and expose the idiotic moments of the week that may have been forgotten. It's time to shine a light on all the dark, seedy, wacky and strange happenings in the world of wrestling.
Here are WWE's worst moments of the week!
No. 5: No Mention of Doink
The world was a little less funny last week, as Doink The Clown was no longer with us. If you get your wrestling news from WWE though, you were left unaware of this.
It was like a pie full of garbage to the face.
We should be used to this by now, but still, every time WWE doesn't acknowledge the death of one of their former stars on air, it just comes across as rude.
The company could have easily dedicated one of its shows to Matt Osborne, the man who played the original Doink, with a brief graphic. Instead, his passing was completely ignored.
What other TV show wouldn't at least bother to put up a line of text about a former cast member's death before the credits?
When Osborne played the Doink character, he had a pretty solid push. He competed at WrestleMania IX, and later took on Bret Hart at SummerSlam 93. He was a featured act in the early days of Raw. This should have been enough to at least have his name spoken.
Yes, WWE mentioned his passing on its website, but taking one single minute out of their six hours of TV to show a video would have been nice. At the very least, a brief mention by the announcers would have shown some respect.
This is pro wrestling though, and far too many men and women die before their time. It's a crazy circus like atmosphere, and WWE doesn't want to take us out of the environment for a minute. Even if it is to pay honor to those who helped build the company.
No. 4: Fat Kaitlyn
photo via withleather.uproxx.com
The men in WWE fight over who is tougher, the women in WWE fight over who is fatter.
On Raw, WWE went back to their usual bag of tricks and pulled out a Photoshop picture of one of their wrestlers looking stupid. This week it was Kaitlyn's turn.
Since Kaitlyn's body is closer to what an average woman's body looks like, than say The Bellas do, this makes her morbidly obese in WWE's eyes. Just like Mickie James and Natalya, this must be pointed out whenever possible.
What exactly is with the company's weight fetish? Are those in management trying to shame their talent into losing weight? Have the writers been turned down by so many women that they're working out their issues on TV?
And just in case you didn't think this was all about making fans think that Kaitlyn is fat, AJ told us on SmackDown that Kaitlyn is less-aerodynamic because of her "flabby man arms."
For a company that supposedly caters to children, that's a terrible message. Not just terrible for the young ones, but for all of humanity.
No. 3: Cryback Leaves Match
photo via wwe.com
One week, Ryback is back to beast mode and he’s laying out The Great Khali with an impressive feat of strength.
The next, he's waving off a match because his leg hurts.
Somehow, I doubt this is going to propel him back into the main event.
Crybaby heels don't make money. Who cares if Chris Jericho beats Ryback? If he does, he'll have beat a whiner and a complainer, not a monster.
As much as some fans don't like Ryback, you still have to feel for the guy just a bit. He was nearly a big star, but the company bungled his push so badly that he went from unbeatable to a crybaby who won't fight The Miz.
No. 2: Vickie Guerrero Bully-a-Thon Continues
photos via tumblr.com and ign.com
All right, this is going nowhere incredibly fast. It feels like this McMahon family drama has been going on for the past five years.
While Vince McMahon's and Triple H's appearances on Raw were bad enough, Stephanie stole the show once again with her awfulness.
Watching Vickie attempt to buddy up, only to have Steph yell in her face was just rude. Are we supposed to like her for this? Who is the good guy here? How does this promote Money in the Bank?
Also, would WWE for the love of God stop leaving the camera on Vickie an extra five seconds after every segment before commercial break? Its awkward, and unrealistic. People don't just stand in place with the same expression on their faces for a minute.
Rumors are suggesting that whatever is going on with the McMahons is going to go down at WrestleMania XXX. Does this mean we have to sit through nine more months of this?
I'm not a betting man, but if I was, I would bet that Vickie Guerrero's job evaluation will make this list next week.
No. 1: Total Divas Cast Meeting
screencap from wwe.com
If WWE is in the business of promoting their new Divas show on E!, this was certainly not the way to do it!
On Raw, the Bellas hosted a backstage Total Divas cast meeting. The entire point of the meeting was for them to tell everyone else that they're in charge. In charge of what you might ask? Well, that wasn't explained.
For two agonizing minutes, WWE took out its anger on its fans and punished us with a group of professional women fighters arguing about who deserves the spotlight.
This particular backstage segment was, for some reason, shot with two cameras. This was kind of jarring, as no other segment was done that way.
Oh, and we had to have the obligatory fat joke aimed at Natalya, as one of the Bellas dropped this:
"We're not used to carrying all the weight, somebody else is, right Natalya?"
If only Doink were still with us, we could have used some seltzer to lighten things up.
Well, that's all for this week. Agree? Disagree? What was your worst moment of the week? Sound off below, and thanks for reading!