Kevin Nash's Quads, Triple H's Shovel and Fan Guide to WWE-Related Running Jokes

Ryan Dilbert@@ryandilbertWWE Lead WriterJune 7, 2013

Kevin Nash's Quads, Triple H's Shovel and Fan Guide to WWE-Related Running Jokes

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    Newer WWE fans visiting Twitter and wrestling websites could be overwhelmed and confused by all the talk of Kevin Nash's quads and Triple H's shovel.

    Some of the WWE-related jokes may be stale and overused, but they are still rampant. Teddy Long, Sin Cara, Bret Hart and John Cena are constantly the butt of jokes in the form of memes, tweets or generally snarky comments.

    For some background on how these jokes came about so one can get started with making their own versions, here are some of the most common WWE running jokes.

Kevin Nash's Quads

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    Though it has been more than 10 years since it happened, folks are still snickering about Kevin Nash's quad injury.

    In a 2002 match on WWE Raw, Nash was running toward his opponents' corner when he collapsed. His quad apparently tore mid-match and mid-step. It didn't help that this was right after returning from an injury.

    Fans began to make jokes about Nash's quads tearing during everyday activities. When Nash went on a Twitter tirade last year, Chris Jericho got in on the action as well.

    Hope @realkevinnash doesn’t tear his quad tweeting! #typicalbigman#nwothirdwheel

    — Chris Jericho (@IAmJericho) August 8, 2012

Triple H's Shovel

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    Triple H, deserved or not, has the reputation for squashing other wrestlers' momentum or "burying" them. His high position with the company as a star wrestler and executive brings extra scrutiny over booking decisions.

    Say Triple H randomly kicks Wade Barrett in the family jewels for no storyline purpose and be the only one to look good after the exchange, expect a slew of jokes about Triple H dumping dirt on Barrett and burying him with his trademark shovel.

    The shovel jokes were flying when Triple H beat Brock Lesnar at WrestleMania 29.

    The most recent example of this was when Paul Heyman announced that Curtis Axel was his newest client. Triple H got involved and the story's focus shifted on him. Fans, start your shovel jokes.

    Oh, Curtis Axel is facing Triple H tonight? A burying shovel must be Axel's welcoming gift to WWE. #Raw

    — Condescending WWE (@SarcasticSmark) May 21, 2013


Bret Hart's Rating System

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    In an interview with Arda Orcal (via Bret Hart said that he thought the Brock Lesnar and Triple H match at WrestleMania 29 was a 4 out of 10. He clarified those comments on Twitter and said he was referring to a sign in the crowd.

    It was too late. The fact that he'd already given the Undertaker and Triple H match the year before the same rating had WWE fans clinging to a new joke.

    Unimpressed with anything, give it a 4/10. Something is really awesome, make a joke that The Hitman would give it a 4/10 regardless.

    Bret Hart Appreciation Night survey shows that only 4 out of 10 people liked it :-P4/10

    — WWF Old School (@WWF_OldSchool) June 2, 2013

Teddy Long's Love Affair with Tag Team Matches

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    Few things are certain in life and one of them is that if Teddy Long comes out to ringside with a microphone in hand, fans are going to see a tag team match.

    Once fans hear Long's music that everyone knows a tag team match is on the horizon. What's the solution to improving ratings, building toward the pay-per-view or fixing the economy? If you ask Mr. Long, he may tell you "a tag team match, playa."

    WWE is even in on the joke as it listed the 10 best tag team matches that Long has put together.

    I love the fact that since Teddy Long has taken charge of Smackdown again on the fly tag team matches are popping up everywhere

    — Wrestling Memes (@Wrestling_Memes) May 26, 2013



Sin Cara's Botches

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    It doesn't matter how much Sin Cara has cleaned up his ring work. It doesn't matter how much he's adapted to the WWE style after spending so many years in Mexico.  Some fans are still going to associate Sin Cara with flubbing moves.

    With as many jokes as people have made about it, it's hard now to hear the word "botch" and not think of Sin Cara.

    There is an added layer of scrutiny on him, as some folks are just waiting to make a botch joke during one of his matches.

    Much in the same way that Kevin Nash quad jokes are applied to him doing everyday things, Sin Cara botch jokes can center around him botching anything from getting out of bed to asking a girl out.  

    Sin Cara can't botch his entrance if he doesn't get one. Took us too long to realize that. #RAWTonight

    — WWE Creative Humor (@WWECreative_ish) March 12, 2013

John Cena's 5 Moves

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    John Cena has a predictable sequence of moves to end most of his matches. Even he's aware that they're referred to as the "five moves of doom." This has been exaggerated to say that he only has five total moves in his repertoire.

    Anything he does out of the ordinary is a departure from the five moves. Any Cena bashing can include how much he sucks because he only has five moves.

    The joke actually began with Hulk Hogan who also had a very set routine to cap off matches. Had the Internet been as prevalent in his prime as it is today, Hogan likely would have gotten the same guff that Cena gets on a daily basis.

    Cena did a rana?!? But that's not in the 5 moves of doom... #wwe #tlc

    — Rhia O'Reilly (@rdpixie) December 22, 2012

Ric Flair's Propensity to Bleed

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    Ric Flair bled a lot during his career. He bled so often and in such unnecessary situations that even though he rarely gets in the ring, Flair blading jokes are a staple of WWE discussions.

    It doesn't take much for Flair to bleed now with how often he's cut his own head. Make way then for jokes about bleeding from watching a bloody match or dreaming about his old matches.

    Other wrestlers bleeding may lead to Flair-related jokes as well. It's at the point that if Flair finishes a segment without bleeding, the jokes start rolling about the lack of blood.

    Either Ric Flair didn't blade or he's out of blood.

    — HunterHearstHelmsley (@NotTripleH) December 18, 2012

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