John Clayton – Since 2007, the fateful year the Falcons saw Michael Vick sent to jail, coach Bobby Petrino resign midseason (kindly leaving a resignation paragraph on the lockers of every Falcons player), and any number of internal disputes (we're looking at you DeAngelo Hall), owner Arthur blank has found a winning formula since then in bringing in regular, boring, low-risk people into the organization.
I mean, Matt Ryan is a total bad ass and all, but let’s be honest, he doesn’t provide any excitement. He doesn’t say stupid things, he doesn’t get arrested, he doesn’t shoot himself in the leg, he’s just too clean.
The only person in the world cleaner than Matt Ryan is ESPN’s John Clayton, who, as far as we all know, lives in a hole somewhere in Bristol. Have you ever seen him on location? Didn’t think so. And if you have, it’s a green screen.
By drafting Clayton, Arthur Blank will be able to answer the age old question: does John Clayton have a ponytail? Seriously, look at him…he’s creepy enough for it to work…