The Doctor's WWE Main Event/SmackDown Recap: Things We Learned, Loved and Hated

The Doctor Chris MuellerFeatured ColumnistApril 20, 2013

Picture by Natasha Farley (Images property of WWE, BBC and Bleacher Report)
Picture by Natasha Farley (Images property of WWE, BBC and Bleacher Report)

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to my weekly Main Event and SmackDown recap list. I always appreciate my loyal readers, but for those of you who are new, each week I recap SmackDown with a long list.
The entries are made up of equal parts observations, humor, recap, play-by-play, revelations, speculations, questions, answers and anything else I notice during the show. I sometimes comment on commercials, too, just because I get bored during them.
I try to interject some fun into these lists, so I hope you have fun reading this week's list of the things we learned, loved and hated from the show.


Main Event

1. The show is kicking off with a battle royal to determine who will face Wade Barrett for the IC title later.
2. The participants in the battle royal are Primo, Epico, Justin Gabriel, Yoshi Tatsu, both Usos, Alex Riley, 3MB, Santino and Khali.
3. Barrett comes out and says he isn't worried about defending his title judging from who is in the ring, and then Khali's music hits and he comes out as the final entrant.
4. Santino tries to avoid everyone at first, but Primo sees him and starts working him over.
5. Santino sells a chop from Khali like Ric Flair would.
6. One of the Usos is the first to go.
7. I just realized what an internationally diverse group of Superstars this is.
8. Khali is from India, the Colons are from Puerto Rico, Santino is an Italian from Canada, Gabriel is South African, D-Mac is Scottish, Mahal is an Indian-Canadian, The Usos are Samoans from California and Yoshi Tatsu is from Japan. And they are facing an English IC champion.
9. And then there's Alex Riley, whom I am shocked to even see in a televised match.
10. That means we have Superstars from four different continents (and seven to eight countries, depending on where you bill certain people from) in one ring right now. This is like a United Nations meeting.
11. After the break, we see that Santino, Gabriel, D-Mac, Primo, an Uso, Riley and Khali are left.
12. It takes six guys to eliminate Khali from the match.
13. I love how they treat Khali like a major threat when he hasn't won a big match in a few years.
14. Riley sends the last Uso over the top with a dropkick.
15. I got distracted by the fact that Rosa was literally just jumping up and down in the background and I missed Riley getting eliminated.
16. Primo and D-Mac start double-teaming Gabriel until Santino comes over to make the save.
17. Primo gets sent through the middle rope.
18. Santino gets eliminated by D-Mac.
19. He tries to throw out Gabriel, but Gabriel skins the cat and eliminates McIntyre.
20. Primo comes back in and gets back-dropped right over the top rope to make Justin Gabriel the winner.
21. He has been getting a few wins lately. I wonder if they are considering giving him a push.

22. The next 15 minutes is all recap videos, so I will not bore you with details about what you already know.
23. Barrett gives and interview before the IC title match and Striker asks him if his luck is taking a turn for the worse.
24. Barrett insults Striker going from Superstars to interviewer.
25. How many times have Barrett and Gabriel been in a singles match together?
26. It feels like a match we see about once every few weeks.
27. Gabriel's track record against Barrett is not good, if memory serves me correctly.
28. That Beyonce commercial is everywhere. I can't get away from it. This is twice during Main Event that I have seen it.
29. Gabriel tries for a roll-up right away, but Barrett doesn't budge.
30. Some counters and exchanges lead to Gabriel hitting a series of kicks for a near-fall.
31. Barrett gets up and starts in with the hard right hands.
32. I love the way JBL puts people over on commentary. He always talks about the little details in a Superstar's performance.
33. JBL and Cole have their own conversation about an Evel Knievel show for a full minute.
34. You couldn't hear them that well; I wonder if they were trying to cover their mics or something.
35. Barrett takes Gabriel down with a clothesline outside the ring as we head to a break.
36. After the break, we see Barrett still in control, delivering a hard kick to Gabriel's gut.
37. A pump-handle slam leads to a near-fall for Barrett.
38. Barrett hits a big boot to take Gabriel out of the ring.
39. Gabriel makes it back in by eight and Barrett gets right back on him with a couple knees to the gut.
40. Gabriel sends Barrett face first into the second turnbuckle to get some breathing room.
41. Gabriel starts to mount some offense, but Barrett puts a stop to that by simply launching Gabriel into the air and letting him fall down to the mat.
42. Barrett is able to avoid a 450 splash and he hits a massive Winds of Change for another two-count.
43. This match has really picked up.
44. Gabriel counters a pump-handle slam and takes Barrett down.
45. He hits a springboard moonsault for a close two-count.
46. Barrett takes a hard kick to the jaw and Gabriel goes up for the 450, but Barrett rolls across the ring to save himself.
47. Barrett rakes the eyes and then hits the Bull Hammer from the apron.
48. Barrett retains his title in what ended up being a very entertaining match.
49. Both guys really stepped up and made that match fun to watch.
50. The last five minutes of the show highlights Ryback and his quest for the WWE title.
51. The WWE editing team never fails to make a feud a little more interesting with a well-made video package.
52. Main Event was pretty good. The battle royal was a good way to kick off the show and the IC title match was excellent.
53. I could have done with a few less recap videos, but two matches is better than one.



54. The show opens with a video recapping the feud between Jack Swagger, Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler.
55. Fandango's music hits and he makes his way out to kick off the show.
56. He is really hamming it up for the crowd, who seem to be enjoying it.
57. I wonder if WWE spent more on those big set pieces and the cost of moving them than it would have on pyro for his entrance?
58. Fandango gets close to Lilian Garcia and he tells her she is looking excellent tonight.
59. I can't disagree.
60. He asks her some suggestive questions before asking if she has ever Fandango'd (orr is it Fandangoed?) before.
61. He pulls her in close like he is going to kiss her and then he dips her.
62. He says her dip was terrible and he drops her on her butt.
63. If Viscera and Charlie Haas were here, Fandango wouldn't get away with that.
64. Remember that storyline? It was really weird.
65. Santino's music cuts in as Fandango is trying to say his name. Lilian gets a big smile on her face.
66. Santino tells him he is a rude person for what he did to Lilian.
67. He does admit that Fandango has some good moves.
68. Santino mentions some cheerleaders doing the dance on YouTube. I will include it so you can see for yourself just how far this Fandangoing thing is spreading.
69. I will also include a video for an interview he did at WrestleMania Axxess that is kind of funny. I figured you had all seen the Opie and Anthony video already.

70. Back to the ring. Santino takes out the Cobra sleeve and he and the Cobra do a dance to Fandango's music.
71. Fandango is getting really pissed, especially whenever Santino comes over and dances too close to him.
72. Fandango goes after Santino and he gets low-bridged over the top rope.
73. After the break, we get a match between the two.
74. Fandango takes the early lead with some hard right hands.
75. Fandango poses whenever he knocks Santino down.
76. At one point, Fandango just throws Santino's face into the mat.
77. Santino gets up and starts to hit some of his signature moves.
78. The Cobra comes out again, but Fandango counters into what is essentially Ken Anderson's Mic Check for the pin and the win.
79. That is actually a brilliant finisher for him to use. The setup for it looks somewhat like a dance move you see a lot in ballroom dancing.
80. They should start mentioning the name of his dancer. I wonder if she will ever get involved in his matches?

81. Booker is reading Teddy the riot act backstage when Big Show walks in.
82. Show thanks Teddy for giving him a tag team partner instead of putting him in a handicap match like Booker did.
83. Booker stares at Teddy, who runs out of the room to catch up with Big Show.
84. After the break, we get U.S. champion Kofi Kingston vs. IC champion Wade Barrett in a non-title match.
85. They lock up and Barrett backs Kofi to the corner.
86. Kofi avoids a right hand, but he ends up taking a knee to the gut.
87. Kofi hits a Russian leg-sweep and follows it up with a hard kick to the face.
88. Barrett kicks Kofi from the top rope to the floor.
89. Kingston gets no time to recover, as Barrett follows him to the outside and slams his head into the announce table.
90. Kofi gets set up on the top turnbuckle and Barrett hits a running knee lift for a near-fall.
91. Before he can start building a head of steam, Kofi gets ripped off the middle rope by Barrett.
92. Kofi tries to take Barrett down with a crucifix pin, but Barrett drops him in what sort of resembled White Noise.
93. Barrett makes a lazy cover and Kofi is able to counter it for the pin and the win.
94. That was a good match. I would say Barrett and Gabriel from Main Event was a little better, but still a good match.

95. We get replays of both times Mark Henry attacked Sheamus.
96. Henry is shown backstage giving an interview and Sheamus comes out of nowhere and spears Henry off his feet, much like how Henry did to him on Monday.
97. Alberto Del Rio is out after the break in what looks like yet another new shirt.
98. Hasn't he had three different shirts on in the past three weeks? How many does WWE make for this guy?
99. A quick visit to reveals he has three shirt designs, one of which I do not even remember seeing him wear before.
100. Just to compare, I clicked on CM Punk's name. He has 10 different designs available!
101. Overkill is all I can say about that.
102. Jack Swagger is facing Alberto Del Rio after the break.
103. Swagger has a cast on his left arm and Del Rio has his knee wrapped up.
104. They both try a few things, but they end up backing into their respective corners and starting again.
105. Del Rio goes for the left arm of Swagger and Swagger gets to the ropes right away.
106. Del Rio shows his weakness after a leap frog and Swagger takes advantage.
107. Del Rio kicks Swagger off his leg and then he slams Swagger's arm into the steel steps.
108. I guess Del Rio is calling this match. He clearly whispered into Swagger's ear before Swagger counters a suplex.
109. Del Rio's bad leg gets caught on the top rope and Swagger snaps it down.
110. I love how JBL justifies everything Zeb Colter does with, "He's a war veteran, Michael!"
111. Del Rio jumps off the middle rope and as he comes down, Swagger runs right through the bad leg of Del Rio and takes him down.
112. Swagger goes to work on the injured leg of Del Rio, but he telegraphs a back drop and Del Rio hits a crucifix pin for a near-fall.
113. Swagger pops up and takes Del Rio's head off with a clothesline.
114. The knee pad over Del Rio's bad leg gets ripped off and Swagger locks in a submission to wear him down.
115. Del Rio misses a kick in the corner and Swagger gets a near-fall.
116. This has been a pretty technical, back-and-forth match.
117. Del Rio comes back and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.
118. Swagger takes a Back Stabber, but he is able to kick out.
119. Del Rio and Swagger counter each other a few times until Swagger has the Patriot Lock on.
120. Del Rio makes it to the rope to break the hold, but Swagger is right back on him with a Swaggerbomb for a two-count.
121. Swagger shoves Del Rio out of the ring when he tries for the Cross Armbreaker.
122. Del Rio comes back in and hits a nasty side kick for a two-count.
123. Del Rio counters a Patriot Lock into a CAB, but they end up rolling around until Del Rio gets a pin with a cradle.
124. That was probably the best match these two have had in their feud. This is the match we should have seen at WrestleMania 29.

125. The Shield cut in from an undisclosed location while Cole is talking and they address John Cena and Ryback.
126. They think Ryback is afraid of them.
127. Dean Ambrose is going to end up being one of the best heels in WWE on his own someday.
128. Khali, Natalya and Hornswoggle are shown being beat to a parking spot by Rosa, Epico and Primo.
129. They have a little argument, which is why the next match is happening.
130. Let's just get this over with.
131. Who could have guessed that Rosa would wear more clothes when she wrestles?
132. Nattie and Rosa start things off in this mixed six-person tag match.
133. Khali takes out both Epico and Primo with big slaps to the chest.
134. Rosa chases Hornswoggle around the ring and ends up getting clotheslined by Nattie.
135. Khali hits the Punjabi Plunge on Epico for the pin and the win.
136. There. That's done.
137. After what seemed like a dozen recap videos, Mark Henry and Big Show are ready to take on Randy Orton and Sheamus.
138. I find it hard to get excited about a match between any combination of these Superstars anymore.
139. I would actually love to see Orton and Cena get their old feud going again. They are both better now than when they were feuding over the title a few years ago.
140. Sheamus and Henry starts things off. Henry decides to tag out to Big Show before even locking up.
141. Sheamus and Show start trading blows, but Show gets the advantage.
142. Big Show mimics the Irish Hand Grenades and Sheamus comes back and delivers them the right way.
143. Big Show misses a running elbow drop and Sheamus tags out to Orton.
144. Josh Mathews lets us know that between these four men, there have been 17 world titles between them.
145. If Orton is a nine-time champion, then that means he has held more World titles than all three of the other guys combined.
146. However, those numbers mean they are either not counting the ECW title for Henry and Show in this equation or Big Show's two WCW World titles.
147. Either way, Orton has been champion a lot of times for a guy who hasn't held a title in well over two years.
148. Big show hits Sheamus with a huge spear as we head to a break.
149. After some mayhem, Big Show hits Orton with the Chokeslam for the pin and the win.

150. Where the hell was Dolph Ziggler tonight?
151. Between Main Event and SmackDown, we had a few really good matches this week.
152. I would love to see Kofi and Barrett have a title vs. title match but not to unify them.
153. I think one Superstar holding both midcard titles would be a great way to get one of them over even more than they already are.
154. While we did not get any new matches for Extreme Rules, we can certainly see what WWE is leaning toward doing.
155. I have decided to add a new addition to the list. Each week I will end the list with a match from the past. These will not be matches we all remember like Shawn vs. Bret in an Ironman match. These will be matches with big stars that were random TV matches.
156. The first "Blast from the Past" match is Kurt Angle and The Undertaker vs. John Cena and Brock Lesnar from SmackDown in 2003.
157. This match took place over 10 years ago, but three of these men still ended up being in headline matches at WrestleMania 29.
158. Does that mean WWE has failed to build new stars in that time, or that these men are simply that good?
159. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments section below and enjoy this match from a decade ago.


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