People, listen to me. Do not skip work to watch March Madness. It’s tempting, but this is not a good plan. Bosses around America have read the studies. They know that the tournament is upon us.
They know you were healthy on Wednesday.
I know that it is the Big Dance. I know you are excited to watch teams like the North Carolina A&T Aggies and the South Dakota State Jackrabbits. However, the idea of having a job is to stay employed.
Besides, if you were to skip work, you would probably get caught. Here are a few mistakes that you might make:
When you leave the message for your boss on his or her voicemail, you might be unconvincing with your gravelly voice or fake, obligatory cough. You could email or text your supervisor, but that might be too suspicious.
Once you have left your message, you might forget that you are skipping work as you get lost in the revelry of the close games. After heading to local sports bar with your buddy (who is also skipping work), you decide to post a picture of your wings and adult beverage on your Facebook account. Someone will see your ill-timed picture and forward it to your boss.
Another problem with skipping work is that games are also scheduled on...wait for it...Friday! Do you dare skip two days of work? Do you tempt fate? If you return to work on Friday, you must come up with the details of your mystery illness and explain how you miraculously recovered in just a day.
You must have a great immune system.
Oh, and did I mention that the tournament will re-commence the following week? Awkward dilemma...part II.
There are solutions, of course. You could look for a job where you do not work Thursday through Sunday so that you can watch the Big Dance every year. However, this might be a tough way to make a living.
You could work in a sports bar or an electronics store that does not do much business. Granted, those types of businesses probably aren’t doing much hiring right now.
You could attempt to convince your boss that watching basketball is research for a potential client. Good luck with that strategy.
Or, you could actually take some vacation days and enjoy the magic that is March Madness.
Now, you could watch at work (via NCAA.com) but you had better keep your mouse close to the “Boss Button.” Also, you may want to avoid shouting in your cubicle when that lower-seeded team hits a buzzer-beater to win the game.
Why would people risk their livelihood to watch a bunch of kids play basketball? It isn't called March "Madness" for nothing.
Enjoy the tournament. Favorites. Upsets. Buzzer-beaters. Cinderellas. Just don't skip work.