UFC 159 headliner Chael Sonnen hasn't shown much malice towards light heavyweight champ Jon Jones on the current season of "The Ultimate Fighter," but it's a whole different ball game when Sonnen is working his desk job.
Working as an analyst on FUEL TV's "UFC Tonight," Sonnen put together roughly a two-minute poem, providing a one-sided timeline of the events leading up to his title fight next month (transcription via MMA Mania).
"I got a call one day from Dana, he said 'Chael, I'm putting you to work.'
'You see, I overpaid for this light heavy, who I now realize is a jerk.'
'He's been winning fights, but not with brains or with brawn.
And his matches and his one-armed cartwheels are making the whole crowd yawn.'
'I mean, nobody's coming to see him in living rooms or in bars.'
'Why don't you send this guy to Cirque de Soleil, or Dancing with the Stars.'"
In the midst of making fun of the 25-year-old champion, Sonnen couldn't help but to take some shots at Brazilian rivals Lyoto Machida and Vitor Belfort at well.
"They tell me he's good, but I know that can't be true,
I saw him get armbarred by Vitor and he's 52!
He's so boring he made Machida fall asleep."
Jones fought Belfort at UFC 152 in September, winning via a keylock in the fourth round. However, early in the opening frame, "The Phenom" nearly pulled a massive upset by catching Jones in an armbar.
It's also worth nothing that Belfort is actually 35-year-old, not 52-years-old.
Additionally, Jones was arguably outstruck by Machida at their UFC 140 encounter in Dec. 2011, however, the champion rallied back to lock up a standing guillotine choke in the second round, rendering "The Dragon" unconscious.
Furthermore, Sonnen said last month that Machida "cant draw flies" to a title fight, therefore he would never defend the light heavyweight strap against him.
Heading into the April 27 matchup at the Prudential Center in Newark, New Jersey, Sonnen has won five of his past seven fights, with his only two losses coming against middleweight champ Anderson Silva.
On the other hand, Jones has won eight straight bouts, including seven finishes and four successful title defenses.