NBA Superstars: They're Just Like Us!
F. Scott Fitzgerald once wrote, "The rich are different from you and me."
He was right. They have more money. But how else are they different?
You might be surprised to learn that most rich, mega-famous NBA players are just regular, down-to-earth people like the rest of us slobs. NBAers do all the normal stuff that normal people whittle away their time doing, except they can also dunk.
And if you don't believe me, here's a photo slideshow to prove that NBA players are just like us.
Patrick McDermott/Getty Images
Yes, Rajon Rondo is one of the finest point guards in the game. But did you know that the Boston Celtic is also a skilled chef (even if those shrimp look a bit overcooked)?
Just look at these succulent shrimp tacos he once prepared and then shared on Twitter:
Making shrimp tacos twitter.com/RajonRondo/sta…
— Rajon Rondo (@RajonRondo) January 16, 2013
And if you're wondering if that's Cajun or taco seasoning, Rondo confirmed for one of his curious followers that he goes with Cajun spice all the way. Me too!
We've reached an era where many adults now own a video game console. Even for those of us with a vertical leap in the single digits, we can soar to new heights with the help of NBA 2K13 and a few sleepless hours before bed.
And so can Dwyane Wade.
He recently posted a photo on Instagram demonstrating how good Mario Chalmers could be if he was controlled by D-Wade. That's right, 14 points and 16 assists in 13 minutes. Now show Chalmers that game film!
Blake Griffin is one of the most notable high-flying dunkers in league annals. But he's also a big movie buff.
Who among us has not wished they were in the movie Step Brothers? Griffin took that hypothetical one step closer to reality with his photoshopped movie poster for the sequel—starring him and DeAndre Jordan (via Instagram).
Somewhat more disturbingly, he also donned a Bane mask from The Dark Knight Rises, just like so many nerdy teens with too much time on their hands.
LeBron James is playing a caliber of basketball that has never been seen before. He's scoring efficiently and has been lethal for opponents.
But he also likes to wear his Jason Voorhees mask while driving (via Instagram).
You might want to watch that kind of behavior down in Florida, but paying tribute to a classic movie is a good idea anytime.
Even when you're one of the best basketball players in league history like Kobe Bryant, sometimes you get bored with sustained excellence. Sometimes you need a distraction.
Like triple-dog daring a teammate to lick some cold metal in the dead of winter.
Poor Ralphie. Poor Harry. The Black Mamba should set a better example.
Times have changed over the years in terms of decency. It used to be that you couldn't say the word "thighs" in mixed company.
Nowadays, South Park can make an episode where they say that bad word that rhymes with "spit" hundreds of times without censoring it.
But if you're gonna use curse words, make sure your grandma isn't listening or watching you somehow, because they will hold you to a different standard of decorum.
Kevin Durant (aka "Kev Kev") had his granny scold him by text message after one game, and shared it with the world on Instagram.
I know that each one of you reading this has eaten a cookie without using your hands at some point. Next time, film it on your phone!
Dwight Howard was silly enough not to edit the video so that it looked like he nailed it on the first try.
No matter how famous you are, sometimes you have to do silly things for your kids.
When Chris Paul broke his nose and had to wear a mask during games, his son mysteriously developed the same affliction:
Sittin at home trying to make my son a MASK...he said "Daddy I need my mask for the game 2nite bc I fell and hurt my face" #TooSmart
— Chris Paul (@CP3) March 12, 2012
I would venture to say that many people have been injured by an adjacent melee in a bar or nightclub at some point. Some inane disagreement between other drunk people that you have nothing to do with spills over and you receive some undeserved collateral damage.
Tony Parker just happened to have his eye damaged by flying glass from Drake and Chris Brown's epic dust-up, so in his case, it was glass shards from a Jeroboam of Armand de Brignac Champagne instead of just Budweiser bottles.
Ah yes, the highway beer handoff, a timeless everyman tradition.
Steve Nash, welcome to America. (With a Keystone Light, no less.)
And finally, who among us has not insulted another man's wife during a heated moment in a pick-up game?
I'm sure Kevin Garnett was merely referring to the breakfast cereal.