I'm certain that I was not the only person disgusted with Wrestlemania XXV. I'm not talking about the event as a whole, just it's sorry excuse for a main event. But as disgusted as I was with seeing Triple H retain the WWE Championship, I became even more sick when I saw the return of Dave Batista.
Here I was thinking, "just great, just f***ing wonderful". The WWE slapped me in the face by providing the most anti-climatic Wrestlemania ending in years, and now I have to be subjected to another month of garbage.
You see, when it was announced that Randy Orton would not get a rematch for the WWE title, I already knew that the month of April would become another useless delay. I've waited far too long for Randy Orton to regain his (yes, his) WWE title, and I wasn't exactly thrilled with the idea of having to wait some more.
But then a sign of hope arrived, a sign of hope in the most peculiar form. That form, ladies and gentleman, was the arrival of Vicki Guerrero.
I'll admit, when I first heard that she planned one becoming the permanent General Manager of Raw, I threw up a little bit inside my mouth. But then (much to my delight), Vicki Guerrero became my most unlikely savior.
"How?" you might wonder.
Her stipulation of turning the three-on-three Backlash contest into a WWE Championship match, proved to be a most refreshing dose of hope. So I took some time and analyzed the situation.
In the event that the match remained a non-title contest like Vince McMahon wanted in the first place, it might have provided an opportunity for Randy Orton to win. Otherwise, why not make it a title match so that way Triple H (and the rest of his very weak team) would look very heroic in victory.
Well, that could be one possible scenario but of the sake of my personal sanity, let's hope that we don't see anything of the sort. But I'll get to exploration of the "championship" stipulation of the match a little later on.
Later in the night, the Randy Orton vs. Vince McMahon match delivered exactly what I'd expect, poorly executed and excessively unrealistic choreography.
Almost every blow that Vince McMahon landed on Randy Orton wreaked of unrealistic fabrication. It's not that I don't enjoy seeing Mr. McMahon compete (such events prove to be quite entertaining) it's just the horrendous logic behind the concept of the match itself.
If Randy Orton could wipe the mat with Batista (as he did a few months back), why the hell is he being beaten up by a 63-year old Vince McMahon?
I understand that he is the chairman and the creator of everything I enjoy in my wrestling universe, but there reaches a point where his incorporation into in-ring competition makes the product look much more choreographed and unrealistic than it has to be.
In any event, reality finally began to sink in and Vince McMahon was beaten like a decrepit animal (a much more realistic turn of events if you ask me).
Then, his son Shane decided to make it a two-on-one affair. Protecting his father yes, but further damaging his father's credibility to be able to hold his own (if that's even possible) by resorting to "heel-like" tactics.
Meanwhile, Shane McMahon's punches made his father's in-ring performance look very realistic by comparison, as he laid into Orton with about 27 kitten punches. They looked about as realistic as a Power Ranger's episode and again, provided the program with some additional poor choreography.
So Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase come out (only after Shane McMahon did) to even up the numbers. Predictably, Triple H comes to rescue his family and it became a brawl of sorts.
Then came the surprise.
The return of Batista!
His music hit and he made his way to the ring. While Randy Orton and Ted DiBiase managed to escape, he hit the "Batista-bomb" on Cody Rhodes (who did nothing to him by the way) in an effort to send a message to the man who put him on the shelf.
As an insult to injury, we then find out that Batista would replace Mr. McMahon for the main event match at Backlash.
It was at this point I thought to myself "great, now Randy Orton is really f***ed this time. I'm going to get to see his push buried so that the crowd-favorite Batista can take center stage".
But thankfully, a vision soon came to me.
It wasn't a vision of seeing yet another anti-climatic Triple H triumph and it wasn't a vision of seeing Batista get his sweet revenge.
No, no, no...They've got bigger things for Randy Orton.
I think back to the Backlash stipulation. If any member of either team pins a member of the opposing team, their leader will be the WWE Champion.
Odd stipulation, isn't it?
What the hell for? Why take the focus away from the main competitors anyway?
Flashback to Backlash 2000 for a moment...
The Rock became the WWE Champion in a match with that very same stipulation by pinning Vince McMahon, costing Triple H the WWE title.
So let's travel back to 2009, and you'll see what very well might be going on here.
The creative team wants to put the WWE Championship on Randy Orton, but our heroic WWE Champion might not want to put Randy Orton "over" in the process. Besides, you can't have this evil guy defeat the McMahon family's last line of defense and take away the WWE Championship on top of it.
So the match will be Randy Orton, Cody Rhodes, and Ted DiBiase against Triple H, Batista, and Shane McMahon.
Wait a minute, one of those guys isn't a wrestler!
Yes, one of the six men involved in this match sticks out like The Great Khali's chin. The McMahon's could have made any WWE Superstar the third member of their team but the decided to role with Mr. Kitten Punches.
Could it be possible that a certain non-wrestling competitor gets hit with an RKO and costs his team captain the WWE title? Or how about a twist, Batista goes down in dubious fashion and costs his former mentor the title?
Yes, there is still hope for all of those who would like to see Backlash become a night of destiny. Perhaps I'm a bit too optimistic, but then again, it beats spending the next month with a serious case of RKO blues.