10 Dumbest NBA Nicknames
You know you made it in the NBA if you have a nickname.
Now, that's not always a good thing really, sometimes you "make it" for the wrong reason altogether.
Other times, the nickname you get is so terrible, you end up being known by that name for the rest of your career. The names on this list aren't necessarily bad, they're just, well, dumb.
Uncreative, boring or nonsensical. I think you get the idea.
10. Every Single Nickname That's Just a Fragment of the Name
"Melo", "Beli", "Ray Ray", "JKidd" "D-Mo", "D-Will", etc.
Every nickname that's just a lazy way of shortening someone's actual name. Just get all of these out of the way right now, they are all terrible.
9. Jameer Nelson: Crib Midget
This nickname was actually meant as a compliment when Dwight Howard bestowed it upon Jameer Nelson. From where I'm sitting, there is no way the word "midget" can be used as a compliment.
Especially when it's something you get called by other people around you. I bet Jameer is glad Dwight is finally gone and with him the nickname.
Although, making the playoffs would have been nice.
8. Daniel Gibson: Boobie
This was the name Daniel Gibson's mother called him. I think it's actually not that bad. It's definitely better than some of the other nicknames moms have for their kids.
He could have been known as Daniel "Sweety Pie" Gibson, Daniel "Baby Pumpkin" Gibson, or Daniel "Snoodle Oodle" Gibson.
"Boobie" is really not that bad.
7. Joel Przybilla: The Vanilla Gorilla
I give this name bonus points for rhyming, but that's it. The name is just bad. Again, I know this nickname is actually meant as a compliment, but come on.
There has to be a way to be more creative than this, even if that other way doesn't rhyme.
6. Ersan Ilyasova: Turkish Thunder
I know Ersan Ilyasova is Turkish, but who was the genius behind putting "thunder" as the next word. The guy is not a dunker.
Here is a fun little experiment, type in "Ersan Ilyasova dunking" on YouTube. Three of the first five results will be him getting dunked on by someone else.
That's pretty much all I need to prove this nickname is terrible.
5. Udonis Haslem: Django
Why would you give yourself that nickname? I'm glad you liked the movie, but that doesn't mean you nickname yourself after it.
I liked "The Hobbit", but I would never want my nickname to be "Bilbo". It's okay Haslem, there is a nickname out there for you, let it find you.
4. Anderson Varejao: Wild Thing
The nickname is really dumb, but it gave me an excuse to look up this song right here again. Basically, Anderson Varejao is the reason I got to have a little dance break in the middle of this article.
I want him to know that I really do appreciate that.
3. Glen Davis: Big Baby
I don't care how much Glen Davis wants this nickname gone, he will always be "Big Baby" in our hearts. At this point, more people know the nickname than his actual name.
I get why he would want it changed, but too late now Glen, it's just too late.
2. Corey Maggette: Bad Porn
There is not much I can really say about this name. First off, it's by far the most insulting name on the list, but is also one of the funniest.
Second of all, how did this happen? Well, it started on fan message boards, shortly after Maggette signed with the Golden State Warriors in 2008.
1. Amar'e Stoudemire: STAT
For the longest time, I thought this nickname represented that Amar'e Stoudemite stuffs the stat sheet. That is, until I read that it stands for "Standing Tall and Talented".
Really? That has to be the cheesiest nickname in history. It sounds like the name of an afterschool community service club. It's like I'm back in elementary school.
"After school we have a STAT meeting! Standing tall and talented in helping the environment!"
Thank you for reading and share your thoughts and some other nicknames in the comments below! Also, follow me on twitter for more sports talk!
Like the new article format? Send us feedback!