I'm here today to bring you fine upstanding people some tips and tricks to help you navigate the strange and mysterious world of independent wrestling shows.
For many years, countless young men and women have gone to attend their first Indy show without any real concept of what it was they were getting themselves into.
Today, we'll change all that by providing the Internet's most definitive list of what you'll need to know to get you through a long day of watching fat old guys wrestle skinny young guys, while they get heckled by fat young guys and skinny old guys.
When you leave this web page, you'll be armed with all of the knowledge necessary to boldly walk into a wrestling show anywhere on this great planet of ours and declare, "Preparations are complete, bring me your finest wrestlers."
Only don't say that.