The Hater's Guide to the NFL Playoffs, Wild Card Round

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The Hater's Guide to the NFL Playoffs, Wild Card Round
Andy King/Getty Images

Who's ready for a playoff-sized dose of NFL hatred?

I know I am.

With the regular season over and the playoffs just beginning, it seems like an appropriate time to remind all of you that your favorite team is absolutely terrible. I tried to get out, I truly did. I even said my goodbyes.

They pulled me back in—something about a contract, paycheck, blah blah blah.

So, here's the deal.

All season long, I told you about how much your teams stunk and why they would lose that particular weekend. If my math is correct, I'm batting about .500 per week for the entire season. (Funny how that works). However, I get a major boost from the fact that 62 percent of your teams didn't make the playoffs, thus confirming their "stinkitude." (Note to my editors: "Stinkitude" is totally a word).

If we add in the extra credit from the rest of your teams having you as fans (that is "stinkitude by association"), we can pretty much safely say that I've never been wrong. Ever.

So, without further ado and by popular demand (and contractual obligation, apparently), here's the hate for the Wild Card Round!

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