Oh, to turn 16 again. You get your license, a bit more freedom from mom and dad and Vince Young makes a cameo at your birthday party.
Wait, Vince Young never showed up at your Sweet 16?
Perhaps it was just this young man from Pearland, Texas, who had the former Texas Longhorns standout at his party.
Digital magazine Culture Map reports that the man who failed to live up to the tremendous hype surrounding him in the NFL is making cameos at 16-year-old birthday parties after his football career has pretty much ended.
The 29-year-old stopped by the festivities for Justin Smith, which also featured a video message from Dikembe Mutombo and Houston Texans cheerleaders.
While all of that is completely nuts, I would like to concentrate on the discussion prior to the party. Here is what I like to imagine went down:
Parents: Do you know who it coming to your birthday party?!
Justin Smith: Tom Brady?!
Parents: No, no. Not Tom Brady.
Justin Smith: Hmm, well...Alex Smith? He isn't doing much, you guys must have bought him.
Parents: No, no. Not Alex Smith.
Justin Smith: Oh, god. Not Mark Sanchez, because...
Parents: Dear, no. Not that guy. We got you Vince Young.
Justin Smith: Oh, cool.
Being that Smith is from Texas and the party had a Longhorns theme, we imagine the young man is a huge Texas fan. That means he remembers those years fondly and not the ones that ended with Young getting released by the Bills.
That means little Justin Smith will forever be inclined to think things are far better than they are. Nice for him, but brutal for those hanging with him.
Imagine him at a Sizzler: "Oh, man have you guys tried this steak? It's wonderful, revolutionary, divine."
To Smith, Young will always be that quarterback who could do no wrong on the football field.
Oh, to be 16 again.
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