Well, you've already got the T-Mobile Fave Five, the Fantastic Four, and the Dynamic Duo. I'm just showing six some love.
Confused? Don't worry. After a little while, you'll get the hang of it.
Who are the best fat athletes of all time?
After a ton of research (get it?), I came up with my own list. And no, no lineman or sumo wrestlers allowed...
6. Phil Mickelson
The sleeper of the bunch. Why does the three-time Major champion make the cut?
Two words: Man boobies.
I mean, you can see Phil's breasts through his shirt. Believe me, I know from experience: That should not happen.
5. Robert Traylor
A guy whose nickname alone was enough to get him on the list.
"Tractor" Traylor didn't do much in the pros, and rumor has it he's playing for some random team in Puerto Rico. But his moniker and the fact that he did break a backboard land him in the Super Duper Six.
4. Tony Gwynn
No, Tony Gwynn didn't have a catchy nickname playing on his weight; he's on this list because he could flat out hit.
Gwynn was an eight-time batting champion with over 3,000 hits and a career batting average of .338. I guess that's good enough for us.
3. Cecil and Prince Fielder
This father and son combo probably can't ride in the same car or walk over a bridge together for fear of their own safety. There's a legitimate chance that the duo checks in at over 600 pounds. If we were to weigh them, we'd have to use one of those scales that trucks get weighed on...
OK, enough of the fat jokes. These two can rake. There's a rumor that at the age of 15, little Price ("little" used loosely here) hit a home run in a big league park.
2. John Daly
Daly is one of pro golf's most beloved figures despite his size, drinking, gambling, 
domestic abuse, and failure to win.
To his credit, Daly is that rare Major champion who chats it up with the crowd whenever he plays. And who would've thought there'd be two golfers on this list? With all that swinging and stuff, you'd think they'd all be
lean and mean.
1. Charles Barkley
How can a list of the best fat athletes not include the "Round Mound of Rebound"?
Not only is Barkley one of the NBA's top 50 players—he's also on the best NBA postgame show, and he's got a sweet mug shot.
And so there you have it—the first ever Super Duper Six. If you have any requests, or think I made mistakes with this list, leave a comment and let me know.
comments (6) write a comment »
write a new comment
about 1 year ago
I love the idea for this column Sebastian and I think in general you chose a worthy six.
The order however is questionable. Consider the following:
1) Tony Gwynn is a better baseball player than Prince And Cecil Fielder combined.
2) Phil Mickelson is a better golfer than John Daly.
3) It's cool that Robert Traylor shattered a backboard and had the nickname "Tractor," but he doesn't deserve to be on the same list with the rest of these guys, most of whom are Hall of Famers in their respective sports.
Perhaps the order is supposed to be reflective of their weight/personality, and not of their abilities on the field?
Thanks for the great read!
about 1 year ago
I know you only have room for six, but here are a few names I was looking for when I saw the title...
-Gilbert Brown
-Shawn Kemp version 2.0
-Post-Heisman Troy Smith
-Jerome Bettis
about 1 year ago
Mickelson isn't really that fat. I think there is probably a more worthy athlete to be in the top 6. There are a few pitchers out there that are ridiculously plump. Like Rich Garces for instance.
I would like to see an article about the best current fat athletes and then, of course, the fat athlete hall of fame.
about 1 year ago
I think the difference needs to be clarified. Tony Gwynn and Phil Mickelson are hefty, but Gilbert Brown is a fatass in the truest sense.
Also: what about Akebono, David Wells, and Nate Newton?
about 1 year ago
actually the story is that as a 12 year old, prince hit a upper deck bomb at old tiger stadium,.
about 1 year ago
my fantasy bust of the season: Bartolo Colon. that dude's a diet coke shy of 3 clicks.
write a new comment