Stupid Sports Cliches: Volume One

As adamant viewers and followers of the sporting world, we have been exposed to a countless number of sports clichés in our life.

Some make sense. Many don't. To borrow a phrase from Bleacher Report superstar Jux Berg, I wanted to use this time to rant on a few of them that especially "grind my gears.”

Feel free to add some of your own in the comments section. Maybe I'll eventually publish a second volume.

1. The "freshman mistake" or the "rookie mistake.”

This cliché is especially versatile, as it can be (and is) attributed to any sport on the professional or college level.

It is most commonly used in football and basketball. It is inevitably used whenever a younger player makes a crucial mistake. Say, for instance, a freshman commits a foul behind the three-point line in college basketball. You just know that eight times out of 10 this will be followed up with, "that was a freshman mistake right there" from some talking head on the sideline.

Oh really? He didn't know he shouldn't foul a three-point shooter because he's a freshman?

You do realize that this kid's been playing basketball his entire life, don't you? You don't think anyone ever taught him that? Is that something that they only teach college players during their sophomore or junior season?

A "freshman mistake" is when a freshman shows up two minutes late for a team meeting because he'd always been allowed to get away with it in high school—THAT'S a freshman mistake.

It frustrates me to no end that the existence of this sports cliché is never challenged. To all you sportscasters out there that continue to repeat this drivel, do me a favor: STOP DOING THAT. Next time a freshman makes a mistake, just call it what it is; a mistake. Kinda like your birth.

2. The "fatigue factor"

This cliché is not quite as gear-grinding as the "freshman mistake" because in many cases it is applicable.

For instance, during the course of a long, grueling game a player can become quite tired and sore and it can affect their performance. But I hear this cliché butchered all too often.

The most recent case of this was prior to the NCAA Tournament on Mike & Mike in the Morning. The two hosts were sharing their first-round predictions (I say "the two hosts" because they weren't Mike and Mike—do Mike and Mike EVER host the show at the same time anymore?)

When they got to the Xavier vs. Georgia game, one host picked Xavier. The reason he cited primarily was Georgia's "fatigue factor.”

He claimed that Georgia would be tired from playing four games in three days in the SEC Tournament and wouldn't match Xavier's energy level. Do ya realize how STUPID that sounds?

First of all, they had four entire days of rest between games. You think they're gonna be too tired to play? Second of all, this is the SAME TEAM that just won FOUR GAMES IN THREE DAYS. Trust me, fatigue ain't much of a factor for them.

Third of all, they're 19 and 20 year-old men in superb physical condition. They're known to play five or six games a day in the summer leagues. Fourth of all, you're incredibly stupid if you use the "fatigue factor" cliché in this context. It happens far too frequently for my liking.

3. "They wanted it more"

This cliché is most often used after a hard-fought nail biter of a game. Inevitably, someone will claim that the winning team "wanted it more.” It's never the losing team that "wanted it more,” it's always the winning team.

How insulting is that if you're the losing team? You just fought your ass off for 40 minutes only to learn later on that you never had a chance, because the other team "wanted it more" than you did.

How about simply saying that the winning team came out on top, but both teams fought like hell to win? Is that so hard to say?

Apparently it is, because I hear this stupid phrase uttered far too often. You know what I "want more" of? I want more of these dumb sportscasters fired for using these stupid clichés.

Now is the part when you start leaving comments.