Toronto Maple Leafs Suck According to Newly Fired Wiseacre Santa Claus
Being a Santa at a local mall seems like a fairly easy job to maintain through the brief holiday season. That is unless you manage to insult a little kid wearing a Toronto Maple Leafs hat.
The Toronto Sun (h/t Yahoo! Sports) reports a wisecracking Santa told a three-year-old boy that the Maple Leafs sucked and has since been fired from his job as spreader of good cheer at the Lowe's Toronto Christmas Market.
One bad Santa thought he should step outside his comfort zone of merely listening to little children who really just want to sit on Santa's lap for long enough to tell him exactly what's on their Christmas list.
The last thing they want is for a guy they respect and idolize to rip the team they respect and idolize.
Here is what the little boy's mother, Mary Trent, had to say.
“The first thing he tells my son is, ‘Oh, you look like Paul Bunyan,' ” she said. “Really? Is that appropriate?
“Then he said, ‘Oh, you’re wearing a Toronto Maple Leafs tuque (hat), you shouldn’t be wearing that, they suck.’ At that point, I took my son and told him we should go, Santa isn’t being very good today.”
Trent said her son was inconsolable and cried all the way home to Mississauga.
“He wanted to know who Paul Bunyan was. He wanted to know why Santa said the Toronto Maple Leafs suck,” Trent told the Sun Thursday. “I told him Santa was having a bad day. I can’t really tell him Santa’s a jerk.”
Being told your team sucks from a guy whose lines should be relegated to "ho, ho, ho" and "Have you been a good boy this year?" is tough to take.
But it could have been worse. Santa could have told him that he would shoot his eye out and then shoved him down a slide.
As for this kid, chin up. You will soon learn there are so many more fantastic disappointments in life that you will forget all about this.
Being told your team sucks is a rite of passage for sports fans. That it came from Santa should be worn proudly as a badge of honor.
You might want to leave your Maple Leafs jersey at home next Easter, though.
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