The Hottest Bracket Around

9-Tennessee
5-Florida State

Florida State has too much to offer and the in-shape girl Seminoles run away with the game in the second half.

6-UCLA
7-Texas

The overrated Bruins get run out of the gym by the Longhorns.

5-Florida State
7-Texas

It was the toughest game in the tournament to decide on. Florida State used to be an all-girl school and still to this day has way more girls on campus than guys.

The problem is match-ups, and Texas has many more girls than Florida State. Again, with over 50,000 students, there are hot girls everywhere you look.

SOUTH

1-North Carolina
16-Radford

The Tar Heels have too much talent for the Highlanders to compete with.

8-LSU
9-Butler

The Bayou Bengals know how to party and have the girls to show for it. They rout the Bulldogs.

5-Illinois
12-Western Kentucky

Even though the Hilltoppers have a good chance to upset the Fighting Illini in the real game, they have no chance in this match-up. The Champagne campus is beautiful and has plenty of students to go around.

4-Gonzaga
13-Akron

Even though Spokane, Wash., is not a desired location, it sure beats Akron, Ohio. The average Zip is going to be working the front desk at a tire plant after graduation. At least you know a Gonzaga girl has some money.

6-Arizona State
11-Temple

A Tempe, Ariz., campus or a ghetto Philadelphia campus? Vegas puts the spread of this game at 45.

3-Syracuse
14-S.F. Austin

Even though the winters are brutal and you may have to mess around with a girl while she is rocking a North Face puff jacket, Syracuse edges by the small school of S.F. Austin.

With over twice as many students, the Orange sneak by. Plus, would you want to be in Nagodoches, Texas?

7-Clemson
10-Michigan

Let’s see: one of the best looking schools in the ACC, or one of the ugliest looking schools in the Big Ten? Ann Harbor is struggling big-time with the females, and I give them credit for being able to get recruits to go there.

2-Oklahoma
15-Morgan State

Todd Bozeman, I’m sure you are hiring girls to lure kids to go to school there, because if not, they would be shaking their heads. The Sooners, even if they’re in the “wonderful” state of Oklahoma, have plenty of girls.

1-North Carolina
8-LSU

Even though North Carolina can really bring it, I am biased towards the South and their party ways. The Tigers get after it a lot more, and they get by the top-seeded Tar Heels.

5-Illinois
4-Gonzaga

Illinois runs past the Bulldogs in this match-up. Stockton wasn’t chasing tail while in Spokane.

6-Arizona State
3-Syracuse

The Sun Devils blow out the Orange. Just compare finals week between the schools during December: Syracuse girls are sprinting from the library, bundled up and running to a heated classroom, while Arizona State girls are walking to their final, probably hung over, and not wearing much at all because it’s 80 degrees out.

7-Clemson
2-Oklahoma

The South Carolina campus is packed with hot girls and is too much for Boomer Sooner to compete with. Go to a Clemson baseball game, and you will miss the perfectly executed hit-and-run in the 3rd inning because you are too busy checking out the scene in the stands.

8-LSU
5-Illinois

LSU gets by fairly easily in this Big 10/SEC match-up.

6-Arizona State
7-Clemson

Even though the girls are classier in Clemson, Arizona State just has way too much talent to be overcome.

6-Arizona State
8-LSU

Both schools can party with the best of them, but Arizona State has the better-looking girls. They advance to Detroit.

FINAL FOUR

7-Texas
6-Arizona State

This is by far the hardest game of the tournament. Both girls offer amazing talent but I always have to go with class over trash, and Texas wins it. When Texas girls get wasted, they are known to sing karaoke with their southern voices.

When Arizona State girls get wasted, they are known to keep the party going by “hitting the slopes” in the bathroom (and trust me, there isn’t any snow in Tempe).

10-USC
7-Maryland

Maryland’s surprise run in the tournament comes to the end as the Trojans knock them off.

7-Texas
10-USC

Note only will the 2006 Rose Bowl go down as one of the best games ever, but it also may go down has having the best looking girls in one stadium at a time. Texas gets by because of their girls top to bottom.

National Champion: Texas

When you combine over 50,000 students, a beautiful campus, 6th street, and smart, classy girls, it just doesn’t get any better.

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