The Hottest Bracket Around

6-Marquette
11-Utah State

I know I have hated on the female Mormons throughout the bracket, but we have an upset here. Utah State is the least academic out of the other major Utah schools (BYU and Utah), which means the less dedicated Mormons are Aggies.

A little inside information: nothing is better than a college girl who is ready to rebel against her parents (especially if it is over religion and waiting until marriage).

Also, I’m sorry Marquette. but I’m not impressed with your Golden Eagles. Have you seen Dwyane Wade’s estranged wife? Wow. The two met in college, and it’s no wonder Wade is so raw on the court. The guy was probably in the gym 12 hours a day to avoid her. Wade, you were a top five NBA pick and that’s all you could pull?

3-Missouri
14-Cornell

I’m going with the Tigers here. For this bracket, we are talking good-looking girls, not future congresswomen, doctors, authors and CEOs, of whom the Big Red has to offer.

7-Maryland
10-California

Cal is probably the school I know better than any other. Going to high school in Berkeley, I used to sneak into parties. Trust me; I’m not sneaking in anymore. Looking back, it would be like Flavor Flav sneaking into a library: there's just no point.

Except for the southern California girls who are smart enough to get into Cal (and don’t want to go to UCLA), the Berkeley campus is lacking big time.

Remember, to get into Cal, students better have a 4.0 GPA with steep SAT scores. This game is a boat race; College Park has freaks in Maryland.

2-Memphis
15-CSU Northridge

Biggest upset of the tournament. The 15th seeded Matadors get past the Tigers solely because their school is a state school in California. With the budget crisis in the state, more and more students are forced to go to their third or fourth options.

This means girls, who would have gone to San Diego State ten years ago, are forced to go to lesser-known schools at the least desirable locations. Case in point: Northridge.

But, with over 30,000 students, there are plenty of options. Sure, Memphis has some good looking girls, but the majority of the hot ones are going to Knoxville and getting out of the Hustle & Flow that is Memphis.

1-Connecticut
9-Texas A&M

College Station has plenty of girls who couldn’t get into the University of Texas, and they run all over the Huskies. The only plus of getting with a girl from Connecticut is that her dad might be an accountant for ESPN, and can get you in the building.

5-Purdue
4-Washington

Like I wrote before, Purdue is hurting big time. If it wasn’t for an easy round one match-up, there is no way they get by. The school is very good academically (which typically means less hot girls), and on top of that, West Lafayette, Indiana isn’t a desired location for many.

10-Maryland
2-CSU Northridge

Maryland blows out the Northridge, as they are a one-hit wonder with the first round upset. The Terrapins bring it.

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