The Doctor's WWE SmackDown Recap: The 138 Things We Learned, Loved and Hated
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to my weekly SmackDown recap list. I always appreciate my loyal readers, but for those of you who are new, each week I recap SmackDown with a long list.
The entries are made up of equal parts observations, humor, recap, play-by-play, revelations, speculations, questions, answers and anything else I notice during the show. I sometimes comment on commercials, too, just because I get bored during them.
This week's show comes six days after Survivor Series, and we are already looking toward the future with TLC.
Sheamus and Big Show's feud took a backseat this week to other matches and programs, including Dolph Zigger and Randy Orton in the main event.
I try and interject some fun into these lists, so I hope you have fun reading this week's list of the 138 things we learned, loved and hated from the show.
1. The recap videos that start the show with the voice-over work are really wearing on me.
2. MizTV kicks off the show with Miz bringing out John Cena.
3. I like how Cena uses the couch that nobody ever sits on.
4. Miz talks about AJ and Cena's recent feud with Vickie and Dolph Ziggler before showing a clip of Cena and AJ making out in the ring.
5. Miz asks Cena how the kiss was and Cena gets up like he is offended. Miz backs off but then brings up the hurt knee and shows a clip of Cena hurting his leg while leaving the ring.
6. Cena says he is not 100 percent, but he is OK to compete.
7. I am bored with this segment already. Cena and Miz need to step it up.
8. Cena says AJ is a good kisser and Miz reacts sarcastically.
9. AJ's music hits and she skips her way down to the ring.
10. AJ tells Cena he doesn't have to talk about their relationship and she knows he only kissed her because of Vickie.
11. Cena stammers a little and Miz asks the crowd if they think Cena and AJ are in love.
12. Dolph Ziggler comes out and saves the segment just by existing.
13. Ziggler says AJ is a bad egg and if it wasn't for her, Cena wouldn't be hurt right now.
14. Ziggler shows yet another video from Raw. Is this a talk show or a clip show?
15. Somebody get Bob Saget to host and it'll run for 17 seasons.
16. Speaking of clip shows, The Soup Salutes WWE was hilarious. Watch it if you didn't already.
17. Watching Ziggler smash Cena through the walls of the bathroom stalls was awesome.
18. Vickie comes out and pours water all over Ziggler's fire.
19. She says AJ is pitiful and Ziggler knows how to kiss.
20. Cena makes a joke about not knowing if Vickie is really a woman and Ziggler tries to save it by saying if he kissed AJ it would bring out the woman in her.
21. Cena saying Vickie likes to eat nuts and that Ziggler is still trying to find his was a little shocking for a PG show.
22. They didn't even try to hide the meaning behind it.
Darren Young vs. Ryback
23. Ryback is up right away for the first match of the night.
24. The MizTV set is still in the ring for his entrance.
25. It just seems like lazy timing. Why not have the announcers go to commercial right after the segment was over and then have Ryback enter after the break so they could edit around the crew removing the set instead of leaving it in the ring for his entrance?
26. After the break, Darren Young comes out to face Ryback.
27. I don't even know how to react to the shirt Titus O'Neil is wearing.
28. Titus gets on commentary for this match.
29. Young uses some speed to duck a punch and trap Ryback in the corner, but he gets taken down right away with a big throw.
30. Titus blows his whistle as Ryback follows Young outside the ring.
31. Ryback runs over Young a couple times in the ring before lining up and hitting the Meat Hook.
32. Ryback gets a quick win over Young and Titus gets on the mic and starts yelling at Ryback.
33. Ryback hits Titus with the Shell Shock to take out both members of the team.
34. That was a waste of PTP. They had some momentum recently, but this just made them look weak.
Antonio Cesaro vs. R-Truth
35. After the break, we get Antonio Cesaro vs. R-Truth.
36. Cesaro makes fun of Thanksgiving as he comes to the ring.
37. Truth has the crazy-eyed look as Cesaro gets ready for the match.
38. Cesaro hits a knee to the gut and his delayed throw to start the match.
39. Truth and Cesaro get into a fist fight for a moment and then Truth goes to work with some of his signature moves.
40. Cesaro counters and tries for the Neutralizer, but Truth back-drops him and then hits his finisher for a very quick win.
41. After the match, Sheamus is shown walking backstage and Booker walks up to him and confronts him about attacking Big Show in the parking lot.
42. Booker makes a chairs match for TLC between Big Show and Sheamus.
43. Is there a single person who didn't see that chairs match coming from a mile away?
44. Really. Anyone?
Mistico vs. Dos Caras Jr.
45. Sin Cara vs. Alberto Del Rio is up after the break.
46. In Mexico, this match would have been epic.
47. In WWE, this will be a squash match.
48. JBL puts over both men's history in Mexico nicely.
49. Damn. Sin Cara's yellow lights are back.
50. Sin Cara gets the early advantage with some high-flying offense and ends up taking out Ricky outside the ring.
51. Del Rio reverses the momentum with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.
52. Del Rio throws Cara into the ring post as we head to a commercial.
53. After the break (that came way too early in this match), we see Cara get a roll-up for a near fall.
54. Del Rio comes back with some hard kicks to the back of Sin Cara.
55. JBL is getting in some good jabs on Matthews tonight on commentary. Thank God he is back on a regular basis.
56. Del Rio misses Cara in the corner, but he picks Cara up and slams him right away for a near fall like nothing happened.
57. JBL wants a one-man booth with just himself.
58. Cara hits a unique armdrag and a big kick before a springboard cross body gets him a near fall.
59. Del Rio meets Sin Cara on the top rope and brings him down with an armdrag before applying the Cross Arm Breaker for the submission win.
60. I guess it wasn't a squash, but it was still pretty obvious Del Rio would win.
61. Daniel Bryan and Kane are backstage and Bryan is getting in Kane's face for some reason.
62. Ha-ha! It turns out Kane is upset that he didn't get an invite to Bryan's Thanksgiving.
63. Bryan says Kane wouldn't like Vegan turkey and then invites him to Christmas.
64. As long as Kane can beat up Santa.
65. Give these two a sitcom. The WWE Network needs ideas and this is the best one they have right now.
Big Show vs. Team Hell No
66. Big Show comes out right as we head to break, continuing the perfect streak of poorly timed commercials in this week's show.
67. Bryan and Kane are out after the break to face Big Show in a handicap match.
68. I don't get the logic behind this match. Team Hell No are champions and if they lose, it will not make them look like very strong champions.
69. Show dominates Bryan early on as we see William Regal and Sheamus watching from the crowd.
70. Big Show lifts Bryan up by the beard and throws him down to the mat.
71. JBL gets on Matthews for calling Bryan a goat-face.
72. Bryan gets in some kicks to the leg of Big Show, but he gets put down with one shot from Big Show.
73. Show starts focusing on Bryan's arm with knee drops.
74. Big Show slams Bryan and then goes to the middle rope. He leaps off and Bryan moves out of the way as Show crashes to the mat.
75. Bryan refuses to go tag Kane and instead starts kicking Big Show in the chest.
76. He hits the big roundhouse for a near fall on Big Show.
77. Show lifts him up for a Chokeslam and Bryan turns it into a guillotine submission.
78. Big Show shoves him off, but Bryan ends up back on him with a sleeper.
79. Bryan holds on for quite some time and Big Show starts to fade for a moment before dropping Bryan on his back.
80. Bryan finally tags Kane and he comes in hot with clotheslines and a pair of low dropkicks to Show for a near fall.
81. Kane climbs the ropes and hits the flying clothesline, which ended up really being a mid-air collision.
82. Kane hits a DDT on Big Show and then Bryan tags himself back in.
83. He puts Big Show in the No Lock and Kane walks away out of frustration.
84. Show easily powers out of the No Lock and then Chokeslams Bryan for the win.
85. Kane comes back down after the match and yells at Bryan for being an idiot.
86. Big Show tries to hit Kane with a WMD and Kane moves.
87. Both men go for a Chokeslam and Bryan kicks Big Show in the leg.
88. The tag champs send Show up the ramp. He stops on the stage and addresses Sheamus on the mic.
89. They talk some trash to each other and then Show goes to the back.
Kofi Kingston vs. Damien Sandow
90. Wade Barrett is on commentary for Kofi Kingston vs. Damien Sandow for the IC title.
91. JBL and Barrett exchange some pleasantries when he sits down.
92. Wade Barrett just called Damien Sandow an unknown quantity.
93. I didn't realize there was more than one Sandow.
94. Sandow starts off strong and takes Kofi down with a snap suplex for a one-count.
95. Kofi comes back and clotheslines Sandow over the top rope.
96. Sandow ends up tricking Kofi when he comes back in and is able to run Kofi into the post.
97. Matthews threw to commercial way too early. Who edits this show?
98. Sandow is in control when we come back.
99. Sandow hits Kofi with the side Russian leg-sweep before hitting the Elbow of Disdain for a near fall.
100. Sandow yells at Kofi to quit as he wrenches his neck in a headlock.
101. Sandow being so vocal in his matches really adds to his character.
102. Sandow stays aggressive with Kofi, but he gets hit with a big cross-body for a near fall.
103. Kofi gets tripped and hits his neck on the middle rope, allowing Sandow to get a roll-up and a near fall.
104. Kingston starts hitting all his signature moves as he builds up to the Trouble in Paradise.
105. Kofi hits it and gets the win to retain his title.
106. Barrett gets on the table with a mic after the match and talks trash at Kofi.
107. I am glad Kofi and Sandow got some decent time to have a good match and that it ended cleanly.
108. Lately, it feels like we are getting too many dirty finishes to matches. They are OK in small doses, but definitive winners are what people want to see.
Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler
109. A recap is shown of the celebration CM Punk had to celebrate to commemorate his year-long reign as WWE champion.
110. Ziggler is out for his match with Randy Orton before we head to commercial.
111. I'm not going to talk about how terribly placed these commercials are anymore.
112. I would have better luck snipe hunting than affecting any change in their programming.
113. Orton makes his way out when we return.
114. Orton gets control of the match early.
115. Orton hits a nice dropkick for a near fall.
116. These two have the best dropkicks in the business. JBL agrees.
117. Ziggler ends up getting thrown out of the ring by Orton and Ziggler tries to escape through the crowd.
118. Orton pulls him back and then clotheslines him over the barricade.
119. I won't complain about the commercial break in the middle of the match. I want to, but I won't.
120. We return to see Orton hit a side suplex for a near fall.
121. JBL makes Matthews look like a moron by quizzing him on the presidents for a minute.
122. Orton slingshots Ziggler's neck right into the bottom rope.
123. Ziggler surprises Orton on the outside by throwing him into the table and then hitting a huge dropkick.
124. Ziggler holds his knee after the dropkick, but he seems OK once Orton gets back in the ring.
125. Dueling chants break out as Ziggler keeps Orton grounded with a headlock.
126. Orton hits his signature backbreaker for a near fall.
127. Ziggler hits a DDT for a two-count.
128. This is not their best match, but it is probably going to be the best match of this show.
129. Sandow and Kofi had a good match, but these two have great chemistry after all their encounters.
130. Orton ends up hitting a superplex followed by the clotheslines and powerslam you can set your watch to.
131. Ziggler rolls up Orton when he goes for the RKO and gets the surprise win with a handful of tights.
132. Ricardo Rodriguez runs into an RKO and then we see Del Rio on the apron.
133. Del Rio backs off and then we see John Cena come out and attack Ziggler on the ramp.
134. He locks in the STF and the show goes off the air with a bunch of officials trying to pull Cena off of Ziggler.
135. A lackluster show had a pretty decent ending.
136. Orton and Ziggler stole the show, Ziggler actually got the win and the way the show ended with two simultaneous attacks by Del Rio/Rodriguez and Cena really came out of nowhere.
137. The first few matches were way too short and the handicap match was kind of pointless.
138. Dolph Ziggler has had two decent wins this week, which could signal that WWE is starting a push to lead into a cash-in for the title. My guess is that after a TLC match—where either Sheamus or Big Show will be so badly beaten after their chair match—that Ziggler easily defeats them.
Thanks for reading and make sure to join me here on Bleacher Report for live Monday Night Raw coverage. Follow me on Twitter @BR_Doctor.