Rumors & Realities has, more often than not, a tight schedule that enables R-R to take a breath of fresh air only moments before bidding a final farewell for the world.
R-R checks out the latest headlines of European journals to see the latest futile news and fabricated pieces of washed up, Cristiano Ronaldo-to-Real Madrid-like news, collects them, and writes them rashly into a piece—more often than not—unworthy of being called an article.
And R-R has been busier than ever as of late, trying to guess whether Tottenham and Newcastle will stay up, betting Mark Hughes will lose his job after the season ends, and continuously following Guus Hiddink's "hints" regarding his managerial future.
The rumors of our present day include: Hiddink's wonderfully-crafted dull hints that keep R-R wandering in the dark, wondering, "OK, he will be under Abramovich, but where?"
The latest news in Hiddink's soap opera includes the news that the Dutch manager's contract has a clause that enables him to part ways in good spirits with the Russian FA if Russia fail to qualify to World Cup 2010.
Staying in England—where R-R finds the most of its reliable news and quotes—Frederic Kanoute says he has received interest from several English clubs.
Kanoute, 31, has already played for English Premier League clubs West Ham United and Tottenham in his career.
In Spain, the president of Xerez, Joaquin Bilbao, was arrested this morning for his part in a shootout in a brothel and has now resigned from his position.
Bilbao seems to be convinced that Luciano Moggi's success at Juventus makes him the best role model.
R-R has had fewer reads than ever, less comments than ever, and continues to thank Abhimanyu Vinay Rajput for being a friend and a fan of the series. R-R's final shot at fame has to feature aiming sarcasm at itself. Suicide may be on the cards for R-R now.
And like that, R-R, bored to hell that the transfer window is three months away, approaches the balcony door.
R-R opens the door as the classical sad tunes of some musician play. Will it be the end of the road of Rumors & Realities?
Ladies and gentlemen, readers (if anyone has read this), it is up to you to choose whether R-R actually commits suicide and never shows itself on a Bleacher Report page again or remains to try to be funny.
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Cheers! (For the last time?)