Jay Cutler's diary was seized Tuesday, Adam Schefter reports. Inside were countless reports of Fall Out Boy concerts and writing songs. Here's an excerpt of some of the disturbing facts found inside...
That Josh McPoopiels is such a meanie-face! Jeez! I mean, I'm Jay Cutler. JAY FREAKIN' CUTLER!
Why would you try and trade me! I have worked my butt off. Plus, I have diabetes, just thought I'd throw that in there.
Detroit is my nightmare. Can someone say "0-16"? I'd never win again there. But what's even worse is the talk about Cleveland! That Eric Mangini guys a rat. I would never wanna play for him.
Eh, but I guess I can deal with it. I mean, all Josh McPoopHead did was betray me, talk about me behind my back, I have diabetes, try and trade me and then openly deny it. Oh, by the way, I have diabetes.
There's no way I'm ever playing for this guy again. He's a meanie-face and if (insert new team here) ever plays him again I'm going to beat him into a pulp!
Speaking of pulp, I had waffles this morning. On the side? Orange juice. Orange juice has pulp. I saw Pete Wentz of Fall Out Boydrinking orange juice once. Then I started. I wanna be just like Pete Wentz when I grow up.
He's my idol. I love Fall Out Boy's music. The lyrics really hit home, y'know? Wait, my phone's ringing.... Ugh, it's that jerk Josh McDaniels. I guess I'll talk to you later.
P.S.; I have diabetes."
Adam Schefter reports Josh McDaniels took great pain from the "McPoopHead" comments and will scold Cutler at the teams next meeting.
Like the new article format? Send us feedback!