A Hater's Guide to NFL Week 6: Why Your Team Is Bound to Lose

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A Hater's Guide to NFL Week 6: Why Your Team Is Bound to Lose
Jamie Sabau/Getty Images

Why do people hate?

I mean, why can't we all just get along? We're really just one big happy family, except for that one guy. You know who I'm talking about—the one with the teeth. Yeah. The rest of us though, just one big happy family.

Jealousy has a lot to do with hate. No one takes potshots at Tom Brady without wondering what it would be like to be married to Gisele and be paid millions of dollars to throw a football around. It's easy to make fun of the "weird" Oakland Raiders fans in the black hole, but we'd love to have them on our side Sunday afternoons.

Sometimes, hatred is just good old hate—the irrational stuff that doesn't have any basis in reality. Trying to come up with a logical reason can drive a man insane.

What's that? Why do I hate?

Oh, well...I'm told that I hate your team because I secretly love other teams. I'm also told, regularly, that I hate certain players because I watch them play without team-colored glasses on. As we well know, any negative opinion about someone must be pure unmitigated hated.

I'm also not terribly fond of the way you smell. Seriously, let's do something about that. I'm not sure where it's coming from, but I'm relatively positive a doctor should look at it.

Why do I hate your team this week? Check it out...

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