"You think you know me..."
These are the words that signal the arrival of Edge, the self proclaimed Rated R Superstar. He calls himself the Ultimate Opportunist. He calls himself the absolute best.
But lately, Adam, you've been nothing more than a certified tool.
Let's take a look at Edge's reigns as champion...in the beginning. It's clear Adam that you have lost your way. You believe you're the best, but you have yet to prove it lately. You claim to be the reason that SmackDown is the way it is, which is partially true. But in all honesty, Adam, do you really need Vickie to further your career? It's obvious that in the beginning of your Rated R Era, you didn't.
When Edge won the first ever Money in the Bank at Wrestlemania 21, he survived the fury of Chris Benoit to get there. Almost a year later, he cashed in the briefcase and defeated a bloody and battered John Cena to hoist his first ever WWE Championship.
He did his way. He did it solo. He did it without Vickie Guerrero.
Fast forward to a short time later. Edge mercifully attacked Kennedy and defeated him to earn Kennedy's MitB Briefcase. That same week, Edge cashed it in again and defeated a bloody and battered Undertaker to hoist his first of many World Heavyweight Championships. Are you starting to notice a trend here?
But again, he did it on his own. He did it solo. He did it without Vickie Guerrero.
But since his first championship reigns, Edge has been nothing more than a Freak on a Leash. And it is because of his "wife" that when it's time for Hall of Fame honors ten or so years from now, his induction will be marred by his "relationship" with the SmackDown GM.
It is because of Vickie that Edge was able to lay claim to the WWE Championship at Survivor Series back in November. It is because of Vickie's interference at Royal Rumble that allowed Matt Hardy to screw his brother and help Edge hoist the gold once more. And it is because of Vickie's actions at No Way Out that Edge heads into Wrestlemania once again the World Heavyweight Champion.
So if anyone is keeping score, Edge has been champion three times in less than three months. The last two pay per views have been Edge's party. And yet, for those of us who remember Edge when he was screaming out, "For the benefit of those with flash photography..." it's rather sad to see him go from one of the most decorated champions of our generation to becoming nothing more than a hemorrhoid in the annals of WWE history.
There is no denying that like Chris Jericho, Edge will be inducted into the Hall of Fame. But until that day comes, these two continue to add their names to the Hall of Shame. From dodging rematches to bullying WWE Legends, the two go hand in hand with why the books will show what they have done on their own...not what they were thrown into.
Adam, it's time for you to cut the strings that the Mad Cow has on you and return to your original Rated R Status.
But until you do that, I have no choice but denounce your claim as the Ultimate Opportunist and deem you: The Ultimate Hemorrhoid.