"Why do you need new bands? Everyone knows rock attained perfection in 1974. It's a scientific fact."
Standing in a loud grungy music store, surrounded by young bands he'd never heard of, those defensive words were uttered by a clearly out-of-touch Homer Simpson in a 1996 episode of The Simpsons entitled "Homerpalooza."
As a 16-year-old cherub-faced teen, I remember thinking how odd that feeling must be. It just seemed so old. To really step in the cement of a certain era and let it dry around your feet? That's just weird.
Apparently you have company Homer. Here it is, sixteen years later and I have realized in 1996, I clearly must've planted my Airwalked-feet into the ground as well.
So, how does this tie into the sporting world? This is Bleacher Report after all, not MTV's 120 Minutes.
As a given sport reaches the December of it's season, it is commonplace to assign season grades. Summing up months of intense training, tireless practicing and backbreaking play into the same five letters we used to get for a boring history exam in school.
Well, what better time to merge the two?
Here, for your reading (and listening) pleasure, a step into the past five months of baseball with a soundtrack of the more distant past.
So my baseball-loving, fellow stuck-in-the-past friends, dust off that slap bracelet, break out your Reebok Pumps and crack open an ice cold Crystal Pepsi. It's time to grade the 2012 MLB teams...with a 90's twist.