Friends don't let friends eat pot brownies, especially if they also happen to be an Olympian on the U.S. judo team.
The positive test came after the 23-year-old's July 30 competition. In all, the young man from Westfield, N.J., placed seventh, beating fighters from both Hong Kong and Belgium.
That placement and his record are now sure to be resolved.
And it's all because he couldn't muscle enough curiosity to ask, "Hey, anyone put any pot in these brownies?"
That would have saved him the shameful exit from London, because he said he inadvertently ate something that no doubt made him feel funkier than the Commodores, via The Times Union:
My positive test was caused by my inadvertent consumption of food that I did not realize had been baked with marijuana, before I left for the Olympic Games. I apologize to U.S. Olympic Committee, to my teammates, and to my fans, and I am embarrassed by this mistake. I look forward to representing my country in the future, and will re-dedicate myself to being the best judo athlete that I can be.
Delpopolo was either at some seriously sinister bake sale at the end of July, or he was partying. A word of advice to would-be Olympians and athletes who may be tested:
Always ask about baked goods at a party.
Nobody simply brings chocolate chip cookies or really gooey brownies to an all-out rager. This isn't a potluck, and we aren't having a 1950s get-together.
In fact, stop being such a fatty, eating anything that might be on a table. Ask where the great bounty of awesome baked goods came from, because they may be laced with one hell of a good time, one that could get you axed from competition.
The other scenario is far worse, and that's Delpopolo knew what he was taking and thought it was no big deal. I would say that is highly implausible, because nobody is that dumb to take drugs during international competition.
Which brings me to my last issue with this story: What kind of refined athlete chows down on brownies right before the Olympic Games? Have a carrot—it's only two weeks.
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