One of my favorite hilarious-yet-annoying stories is the way out-of-shape bad movie actor Steven Seagal has inserted himself into the mixed martial arts world.
This guy—despite being at least 30 years removed from doing anything resembling real martial arts training on a regular basis and having never made a single good movie—is still being written about, talked about and interviewed whenever one of the major Brazilian fighters appears on a card.
Hell, this is at least the third story I've written about Seagal in 2012. If you had told me three years ago I would be spending time writing about the dude from those amazingly bad action flicks in the 90's, I would've laughed in your face. And yet, here we are.
You've heard the story of the alleged confrontation between Gene Lebell and Seagal on a movie set. Long story short, Lebell says he made Seagal crap his pants, quite literally, with a chokehold. Seagal vehemently denied the story on a recent episode of The MMA Hour:
There was never any confrontation with him ever. In any way, shape or form. And I swear to god on my children – and they are the most precious thing in my life – if he is saying that he is a pathological scumbag liar. I keep answering that. Either he made up this lie or someone made it up.
Calling Judo Gene a scumbag isn't the best move. For starters, everyone in the world knows that Judo Gene is, even at his advanced age, one of the baddest men on the planet. He also has a touch of the crazy eyes, which makes me think he would have zero problems just absolutely wrecking someone if they provoked him.
Gene doesn't have to worry about putting his own boots to Seagal, because he's got a young world champion at his side who's ready and quite willing to do that. Check out what Ronda Rousey had to say about Seagal's comments towards her coach:
Would you ever admit it, A, and B, I mean, obviously the guy's a liar. He told everybody he taught Anderson Silva that kick. I mean, seriously, the guy doesn't have a very good track record.
No, [Steven Seagal is not legit]. "He's Aikido. I mean, Aikido's cool, but who in MMA does Aikido? Who has an Aikido background? 'So and so coming to the cage is a world champion with a background in Aikido.' You never heard that once. Have you heard that once? That's for a reason.
I don't want to give anyone another quote, alright, I'm going to give you another quote. I would beat the crap out of Steven Seagal.
Who wins this fight?
If he says anything bad about Gene to my face, I would be forced to do something. I would have to make him crap his pants a second time.
I'm going to say this just once and then let it lie: Ronda Rousey would absolutely destroy Steven Seagal. Yes, in a real fight.