Matthew Berry Will Never Learn
Today I checked Matthew Berry’s (guy from ESPN) 2009 Top 200 draft list. I never read the paragraphs before his picks because those are unfunny. And they make me uncomfortable. Like when I’m watching TV with mature people and all the sudden vag appears on the screen. It just doesn’t feel right.
Anyhoo, I scrolled down and looked at his top pick. I saw Burner Turner. Then I saw Adrian Peterson. I stared for 2 minutes to make sure he did that. He did that, so now I must do this:
See that potato-head up there? That’s a Matthew Berry Voodoo doll. I’m going to punt it once a day until he puts A Pete where he belongs.
I don’t care if Burner had more fantasy points last year. I don’t care if Minny doesn’t have a QB. Chester Taylor isn’t vulturing anything, and the fact that A Pete has 20 more carries than Burner in only 2 seasons means diddly.
Wake up, Matthew, and stop disrespecting the soon-to-be Greatest RB of All-Time.
Original image via Cool Spotters
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