Summer usually means boredom for football fans. Don't worry, though, friends. You're not alone.
During the summer, footballers themselves have hundreds of hours to fill apart from training, matches and general in-season carousing.
Of course, the bad behavior keeps going regardless of whether the season is on. And when footballers aren't breaking the rules, they're usually doing things that are guaranteed to keep us entertained.
Read on to find out six crazy ways footballers are passing the European offseason.
Honestly, though. Who hasn't wanted to pose naked for a team photo after training?
And which club hasn't thought about posting said photo on its official website?
Indeed, the players and management of Norwegian club FK Mjølner were just doing what everybody was already thinking about.
OK. Maybe not.
(h/t 101 Great Goals)
In Norway, the players pose for naked photographs together. In the West Midlands region of England, they apparently relieve themselves en masse.
Police have been called in after Port Vale players were caught urinating in bushes by a park warden during pre-season training.
The warden also reported being verbally abused by some of the players following the incident at Hanley's Central Forest Park.
Port Vale have not commented on the incident.
But supporters' club chairman Pete Williams said: "If the players have to go then they have to go."
Pete Williams, ladies and gentlemen! A real man of genius.
There's really not much to say here. It happens to the best of us, especially when, well, you know.
What are we talking about? Mario Götze was pictured, uhh, raising the ol' mast recently while on vacation.
Footballers have to stay in top shape, even in the offseason. And to stay in top shape, they have to work out.
For Parma defender Cristian Zaccardo, working out is clearly a grueling, draining ordeal.
With short shorts, no less.
At this point, nothing Mario Balotelli does is surprising.
He could become a monk and swear an oath of silence for all eternity, score 100 goals in 10 days or rob a bank for kicks and giggles—and none of us would so much as blink.
With that in mind, this outing in St. Tropez was pretty tame by Balotelli's epic standards.
(h/t Who Ate All The Pies?)