The Fourth of July, which is hands-down the greatest holiday ever, is nearly upon us. And I don't want to hear it from you Christmas-lovers out there. I'm sorry to tell you, but your favorite holiday is overrated. You can have Christmas and its crowded shopping malls, tense family gatherings and feigning excitement for a re-gifted pair of mittens you're just going to donate to Goodwill in January.
I'll take the Fourth of July with its awesome parties, daytime drinking and fantastic fireworks over any holiday on the calendar. Frankly, it just isn't a holiday if there aren't chants of "USA" echoing in the distance, random explosions every few minutes and a DUI checkpoint at every single exit. Independence Day has all that and more.
Much more—like Nathan's annual hot dog eating contest, for example. This annual spectacle is pretty much the Super Bowl of competitive eating and we all know the best way to celebrate America's independence from Great Britain is by stuffing our faces with hot dogs. Although, that's pretty much how we celebrate everything in this country.
Not that Nathan's is hurting in the publicity department, but adding a few world class athletes into the mix would really supersize the whole event. Star power and monkeys dressed as humans are really the only thing this blessed event is missing.
I've put together a list of 15 athletes who, for various reasons, might be interested in entering.