What if David Stern decided to force all 30 teams in the NBA to work together and churn out a massive trade that involved each and every franchise in The Association?
Well, we would get tons of cries about conspiracy theories and a league-wide trade that would probably look something like the one detailed in the next 30 slides.
Using only players currently under contract and draft picks, I have managed to come up with that super-insane, utterly ridiculous, purely hypothetical, 30-team trade that not only works monetarily, but also manages to help every single franchise.
Don't believe me? Well then open your mind and read on to learn about the epic trade that involves no less than 48 players and 10 draft picks.
Josh Smith to the Los Angeles Lakers
Marvin Williams to the Denver Nuggets
Pau Gasol from the Los Angeles Lakers
It is nice to start out with a trade that I have essentially already broken down in recent days.
For a full explanation of why Josh Smith for Pau Gasol makes sense, click here.
JaJuan Johnson to the Golden State Warriors
Byron Mullens from the Charlotte Bobcats
The Boston Celtics should not really have to think about this one much as they would be going from a young stretch 4 to a better big man who operates under the basket and fits in with their system.
Byron Mullens actually looked pretty solid for the Charlotte Bobcats during short spurts while JaJuan Johnson was only able to crack double-digit minutes 13 times the entire season.
Johan Petro to the New Orleans Hornets
Future First-Round Draft Pick (Lottery-protected in 2013, 2014; unprotected in 2015) to the Memphis Grizzlies
Vince Carter from the Dallas Mavericks
This is by no means the blockbuster trade that Brooklyn Nets fans are looking for, but it is difficult to make the Nets into a major player in this 30-team trade. After all, the players they can currently trade have a combined salary of just $8.9 million, leaving them well short, financially, or dealing for anyone like Dwight Howard.
Johan Petro is not exactly the most valuable seven-footer, which is why the Nets are also trading away a future first-round pick to get Vince Carter, a declining small forward who still has enough name recognition to help in the move to a huge market.
Byron Mullens to the Boston Celtics
2012 Second-Round Draft Pick (No. 1 in the second round) to the Houston Rockets
Taj Gibson from the Chicago Bulls
This is pretty much a no-brainer for the Charlotte Bobcats, who know that Taj Gibson has significantly higher upside than Byron Mullens.
To compensate for that difference, the Bobcats are trading away the first pick of this draft's second round to the Houston Rockets. The pick could end up being quite valuable in this deep draft class.
Richard Hamilton to the Denver Nuggets
Taj Gibson to the Charlotte Bobcats
Ronnie Brewer to the Dallas Mavericks
Kevin Martin from the Houston Rockets
Andrew Goudelock from the Los Angeles Lakers
With the exception of the hole left by Derrick Rose's ACL, the Chicago Bulls are just about set at every position but shooting guard.
Giving up their talented backup power forward and their top two 2-guards is well worth it if they are receiving a talented scoring shooting guard like Kevin Martin in return.
Anderson Varejao to the Houston Rockets
Daniel Gibson to the Miami Heat
Omri Casspi to the Phoenix Suns
Tyson Chandler from the New York Knicks
As loyal and great as Anderson Varejao has been for the Cleveland Cavaliers, he is no Tyson Chandler.
Chandler proved this season that he can single-handedly turn around a team's defense and he and Kyrie Irving would form a terrifying pick-and-roll combination.
Vince Carter to the Brooklyn Nets
Rodrigue Beaubois to the Portland Trail Blazers
Ronnie Brewer from the Chicago Bulls
The Dallas Mavericks need to move into rebuilding/reshaping mode after they were swept out of the playoffs by the Oklahoma City Thunder.
Getting rid of the perennially disappointing and injured Rodrigue Beaubois, as well as the shell of Vince Carter, and exchanging them for a solid young shooting guard like Ronnie Brewer would be a good, but not great, move for the team.
Arron Afflalo to the Minnesota Timberwolves
Timofey Mozgov to the Houston Rockets
Marvin Williams from the Atlanta Hawks
Richard Hamilton from the Chicago Bulls
2012 First-Round Draft Pick (No. 11) from the Portland Trail Blazers
Assuming that the Denver Nuggets retain JaVale McGee's services now that he is a restricted free agent, Timofey Mozgov becomes expendable.
The same cannot be said about Arron Afflalo, but Rip Hamilton would be a good replacement for the near future and the top pick exchanged in this 30-team trade would help for the long term.
Tayshaun Prince to the Orlando Magic
Tiago Splitter from the San Antonio Spurs
Daequan Cook from the Oklahoma City Thunder
The Detroit Pistons need to firmly commit to their youth movement and hand over the team to Brandon Knight, Rodney Stuckey and Greg Monroe.
Shipping away Tayshaun Prince would force one of the aforementioned three to step up and assume a leadership role.
Andris Biedrins to the Orlando Magic
2012 First-Round Pick (No. 30) to the Indiana Pacers
JaJuan Johnson from the Boston Celtics
Trevor Booker from the Washington Wizards
Mike Miller from the Miami Heat
I'm pretty sure that getting rid of Andris Biedrins is justification enough.
Kevin Martin to the Chicago Bulls
Patrick Patterson to the San Antonio Spurs
Anderson Varejao from the Cleveland Cavaliers
Timofey Mozgov from the Denver Nuggets
2012 Second-Round Draft Pick (No. 1 in the second round) from the Charlotte Bobcats
The Houston Rockets are giving up one of the best players involved in this trade, so it only makes sense that they are getting back a lot of valuable pieces.
Anderson Varejao is a tremendous hustle player who fills the void in the Rockets frontcourt while Timofey Mozgov is a high-upside young center.
Additionally, the 31st pick in this year's draft could be valuable because this draft class is so deep.
Danny Granger to the Philadelphia 76ers
Caron Butler from the Los Angeles Clippers
Tyreke Evans from the Sacramento Kings
2012 First-Round Pick (No. 30) from the Golden State Warriors
Giving up Danny Granger is a big deal, but this Indiana Pacers team is never going to get over the hump while the small forward is the de facto superstar on the squad.
Tyreke Evans has run out of options with the Sacramento Kings and a fresh start with Indy could do wonders for him.
Caron Butler to the Indiana Pacers
Ryan Gomes to the Memphis Grizzlies
2013 First-Round Pick to the Phoenix Suns
Andre Iguodala from the Philadelphia 76ers
The Los Angeles Clippers need one more elite piece to the puzzle before they can truly compete in the Western Conference playoffs.
Andre Iguodala could absolutely be that piece, and he is coming at a fairly low price here.
Pau Gasol to the Atlanta Hawks
Andrew Goudelock to the Chicago Bulls
Josh Smith from the Atlanta Hawks
Wesley Johnson from the Minnesota Timberwolves
Darko Milicic from the Minnesota Timberwolves
I have already explained why the Lakers should be okay with trading Pau Gasol for Josh Smith and Marvin Williams.
They would be more than happy to add in Andrew Goudelock and upgrade from Marvin to Wesley Johnson and Darko Milicic.
Tony Allen to the Portland Trail Blazers
Quincy Pondexter to the Phoenix Suns
Ryan Gomes from the Los Angeles Clippers
2012 First-Round Pick (No. 18) from the Minnesota Timberwolves
Future First-Round Pick (Lottery-protected in 2013, 2014; unprotected in 2015) from the Brooklyn Nets
Giving up Tony Allen would set back the Memphis Grizzlies a little bit, but the team is not ready to compete quite yet.
The upside is high for their incoming pieces as the No. 18 pick in this year's class could end up being a great player and there is no guarantee that the Brooklyn Nets are out of the lottery by the time the 2015 NBA draft rolls around.
Mike Miller to the Golden State Warriors
Daniel Gibson from the Cleveland Cavaliers
Mike Miller is a better rebounder than Gibson, but the younger shooting guard has more potential and similar shooting skills.
Brandon Jennings to the Orlando Magic
Gordon Hayward from the Utah Jazz
Future First-Round Pick (Top five-protected in 2013; unprotected in 2014) from the Washington Wizards
Trading Brandon Jennings, a young point guard with a seemingly limitless upside, may not be the most popular move, but it would make other teams fear the deer even more.
Jennings' absence from the lineup would allow Monta Ellis to shine even more on offense and his inclusion in the deal would help bring Gordon Hayward, another talented young player, to the Milwaukee Bucks.
Darko Milicic to the Los Angeles Lakers
Wesley Johnson to the Los Angeles Lakers
2012 First-Round Pick (No. 18) to the Memphis Grizzlies
Arron Afflalo from the Denver Nuggets
With the emergence of Nikola Pekovic, Darko Milicic is very much an expendable piece.
The Minnesota Timberwolves were a borderline playoff team while Ricky Rubio was healthy and should only get better as the bulk of young talent on the team improves. Adding a solid shooting guard like Arron Afflalo could push them over the top.
Trevor Ariza to the Sacramento Kings
Future First-Round Pick (Top 10-protected in 2013; unprotected in 2014) to the Sacramento Kings
Johan Petro from the Brooklyn Nets
Jimmer Fredette from the Sacramento Kings
Ed Davis from the Toronto Raptors
It is all about the future for the New Orleans Hornets, so it is a bit unfortunate that they have to deal away a future first-rounder to the Sacramento Kings.
However, they are adding a high upside forward in Ed Davis, who has been held down by the frontcourt logjam in Canada. Jimmer Fredette still has plenty of time left in his career left to live up to expectations as well.
Tyson Chandler to the Cleveland Cavaliers
Iman Shumpert to the Washington Wizards
Toney Douglas to the Phoenix Suns
Dwight Howard from the Orlando Magic
The New York Knicks are getting Dwight Howard without giving up Amar'e Stoudemire or Carmelo Anthony.
Need I say anything else?
Reggie Jackson to the Portland Trail Blazers
Daequan Cook to the Detroit Pistons
2012 First-Round Pick (No. 28) to the Portland Trail Blazers
Jared Dudley from the Phoenix Suns
Jared Dudley has to be one of the more underrated players in the NBA and he would make for a terrific option off the bench whenever the Oklahoma City Thunder need to either shift Kevin Durant to another position or give the scoring champion a quick rest.
Reggie Jackson is a nice young talent, but he is not worth holding onto at the expense of getting Dudley.
Dwight Howard to the New York Knicks
Brandon Jennings from the Milwaukee Bucks
Tayshaun Prince from the Detroit Pistons
Andris Biedrins from the Golden State Warriors
Dwight Howard seems to be trying to push his way out of Orlando once more, so it is in the best interest of the team to get as much as possible in return for the exchange of his services.
Brandon Jennings is a terrific young point guard coming off an All-Star-worthy season and he could be a great centerpiece for this team as it enters into rebuilding mode.
Just to be clear, the Magic are losing this deal but they almost have to lose it.
Andre Iguodala to the Los Angeles Clippers
Danny Granger from the Indiana Pacers
One of the few slides that only involves two players, this one details a trade that works out quite nicely for the Philadelphia 76ers.
The Sixers would lose a talented perimeter defender and a team leader, but they would add a true go-to scorer in the form of Danny Granger.
Jared Dudley to the Oklahoma City Thunder
Toney Douglas from the New York Knicks
Quincy Pondexter from the Memphis Grizzlies
Omri Casspi from the Cleveland Cavaliers
2013 First-Round Pick from the Los Angeles Clippers
Jared Dudley is the best player involved in this trade, without a doubt, but quantity can trump quality when a roster is as empty of talent as the Phoenix Suns' roster will be for the 2012-2013 season.
Wesley Matthews to the Toronto Raptors
2012 First-Round Pick (No. 11) to the Denver Nuggets
Tony Allen from the Memphis Grizzlies
Rodrigue Beaubois from the Dallas Mavericks
Reggie Jackson from the Oklahoma City Thunder
2012 First-Round PIck (No. 28) from the Oklahoma City Thunder
With Raymond Felton and Jamal Crawford both potentially leaving for greener pastures, the Portland Trail Blazers desperately need to overhaul their backcourt.
Giving up Wesley Matthews, as much as the organization hopes he is going to improve while on the roster, might be the best way to do it. By downgrading picks in the upcoming draft and swapping Matthews for Tony Allen, the team can add two more high-upside guards in the forms of Rodrigue Beaubois and Reggie Jackson.
Tyreke Evans to the Indiana Pacers
Jimmer Fredette to the New Orleans Hornets
Trevor Ariza from the New Orleans Hornets
Future First-Round Pick (Top 10-protected in 2013; unprotected in 2014) from the New Orleans Hornets
The unexpected emergence of Isaiah Thomas affords the Sacramento Kings a little bit of flexibility here as Thomas and Marcus Thornton could form a potent backcourt duo.
As good as Tyreke Evans is, he does not have a great spot in the lineup right now and has been shifted from position to position. Trading him for Trevor Ariza would solidify the small forward position while adding a future first-rounder.
Tiago Splitter to the Detroit Pistons
2013 First-Round Pick to the Toronto Raptors
Patrick Patterson from the Houston Rockets
Gary Forbes from the Toronto Raptors
Gary Forbes probably will not develop into much more than a decent role player, but Patrick Patterson still possesses a lot of talent. That talent once made him a lottery pick back in 2010 and we are not too far removed from that draft.
Tiago Splitter is a intriguing young player, but the Spurs have enough depth that they could part with him and not lose sleep.
DeMar DeRozan to the Utah Jazz
Ed Davis to the New Orleans Hornets
Gary Forbes to the San Antonio Spurs
Wesley Matthews from the Portland Trail Blazers
2013 First-Round Pick from the San Antonio Spurs
With Jonas Valanciunas coming in for his rookie season, the Toronto Raptors need to clear out some of the roster space they are currently using for the frontcourt. As good as Ed Davis may be one day, he does not have a true spot on this team given their other options.
Although it is not going to be a popular opinion, I also feel as though Wesley Matthews is better than DeMar DeRozan by a solid margin.
Gordon Hayward to the Milwaukee Bucks
DeMar DeRozan from the Toronto Raptors
DeMar DeRozan is big enough to play small forward in an undersized lineup, which would lead to a potential lineup in which both he and Alec Burks saw the court at the same time. On the glass at least, Burks' skill would be able to make up for the lack of size.
While Gordon Hayward put together a well-rounded season during his second year out of Butler, he just does not possess the upside that DeRozan has.
Trevor Booker to the Golden State Warriors
Future First-Round Pick (Top five-protected in 2013; unprotected in 2014) to the Milwaukee Bucks
Iman Shumpert from the New York Knicks
Although Trevor Booker was a pleasant surprise for the Washington Wizards, he should be viewed as nothing more than a placeholder while Jan Vesely gets his feet wet in the NBA.
That allows Washington the luxury of shopping him around and seeing what he will bring in return. In this case, it is Iman Shumpert, a rookie guard who has already established himself as one of the better perimeter defenders in the league.