30 Ways to Determine If You Are a WWE Mark
After reading Mike Berlinski's column on ways to know you are tired of the WWE, it made me think about the ones who aren't sick of the WWE product.
The tried and true members of the WWE Universe. Those who will not leave even when WWE is stuck in the doldrums. To say it frankly, the marks.
So this is my list on how to determine if you are a WWE mark.
30) The first thing that comes to mind about the WWE Network is "shut up and take my money!"
29) You actually visit WWE.com to get all of your wrestling news
28) You find the new YouTube content to be quite riveting
27) You consider NXT and Superstars to be must-see television
26) You find Eve and Zack Ryder's acting performances to be a great additions to the product
25) You watch both Raw and Smackdown
24) You've bought a ticket to a WWE Films production. It doesn't matter which, any of them
23) When someone says something that displeases you, you tell them to "Suck It"
22) Not only do you accept but you validate that "The Cobra" is a legit finisher
21) Whenever someone makes a valid argument against WWE programming, your only reply is to insult with a "IWC" quip
20) You've created Twitter, Facebook, YouTube (or Bleacher Report) profiles using your favorite WWE Superstar's name and picture. Occasionally, you even impersonate them
19) You wear jean shorts and wristbands to your prom/wedding
18) You'll never admit to WWE Raw sucking (or anything else WWE for that matter)
17) You think Kofi Kingston is Jamaican
16) You really think Hornswoggle lives under the ring
15) You thought "The Invasion" angle was a success
14) You answer every criticism of WWE with "you haven't even given it the time to play out, give it a chance"
13) You let Jericho troll you
12) You think no other wrestling promotion exists outside of WWE
11) The only explanation you can give for ordering every single WWE PPV is "hey, I haven't missed one in this long. Why stop now"
10) You consider yourself to be a part of the "WWE Universe"
9) You think Sin Cara can really jump that high
8) You argue that Triple H has had nothing to do with Sheamus' push
7) You can see Little Jimmy
6) You can't see John Cena
5) "What" is apart of your everyday vocabulary
4) You carry your replica WWE belts to non-wrestling events
3) You buy all the new WWE DVD's when you can just wait for them to come on Netflix
2) You really believe that Triple H is the Chief Operating Officer of the WWE, or that Vince McMahon has been fired, or Undertaker is Kane's brother, etc.
1) You're a John Cena fan
Did I leave any off? Make sure you leave them in the comments below.
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