Time for some real talk here, folks.
Were you at all surprised by anything that happened at WWE WrestleMania XXVIII?
Sorry, let me rephrase that.
Aside from Sheamus stealing the World Heavyweight Championship belt from Daniel Bryan in the time it takes to talk about Peter Piper's pickled peppers, were you at all surprised/shocked/flabbergasted by the WrestleMania results?
Did you not expect The Rock, the most popular crossover wrestling star of his generation, to put an end to John Cena's ambivalent reign atop the WWE?
Did CM Punk's retention of the WWE Championship title against the best efforts of the full-heel'd Chris Jericho give you pause?
Were you surprised by the results at WrestleMania?
What about The Undertaker rounding out his WrestleMania record to a pristine 20-0? Or Big Show getting his revenge against Cody Rhodes to secure the Intercontinental Championship and a prominent place in WWE lore as the 24th man to earn the Triple Crown and the 12th to cobble together a career Grand Slam?
No? Well, are you surprised that you're not surprised, then? After all, this is the WWE we're talking about here, a business built around playing to the crowd in the biggest moments rather than challenging folks with spontaneity and unpredictability.
But, of course, crowd pleasing is what the WWE does, even if it's not particularly interesting to or stimulating for those soothsayers who follow ringside theatrics.
Eh well. At least the entrances were fun, the acrobatics were impressive at times and the man stink was strong enough to waft through the smell-o-vision.