Kaka is expected to join Manchester City next week in a mind-blowing £108million move although Manchester City were rumored to be ready to offer their whole squad in exchange.
Should he join City, Kaka will get a £10m signing-on and a £15m-a-year salary. Not bad, huh?
I'm sure City fans are jubilant, jumping up and down just like monkeys who have finally found the banana stash. But it's sad news for football.
Milan coach Carlo Ancelotti is powerless and has no say on keeping or selling his star player. While the Milan board have been mesmerized by the almost-stupid £108million bid by City.
City will continue their raid of clubs and aim to bring Hamburg star Nigel de Jong to Eastlands.
Meanwhile big-spenders Tottenham, who seem poor with all the talk about City, have ended their interest in Inter striker Adriano and are looking at his team-mate Hernan Crespo instead. Stop staring, Harry!
However, Crespo is unlikely to leave Inter at this stage of his career especially that his earlier experience in England was simply terrible, with injuries and his inability to speak English plaguing his time at Chelsea.
Jermain Pennant would rather stay at Liverpool than join Portsmouth. Now here's an intelligent player.
But one player who would probably relish a move to Portsmouth is Real Madrid's forgotten bench star, Javier Saviola.
Pompey have already confirmed they are in talks to land the tiny striker who first made his name at River before moving to bench-warming at Barcelona, then Real Madrid.
Everybody (but monkeys) are against the Kaka to City move. Milan fans are planning a major protest!
Interboss Jose Mourinho has stated that he wants to sign Tottenham midfielder Jermaine Jenas. This will probably be nominated for Joke of the Year 2009.
Hull have struck a deal to sign Manchester United striker Manucho on loan for the rest of the season.
Everybody (but monkeys) are against the City move. Roman Abramovich is in tears as he sits in his office watching the news and reminiscing the memories of his own raids.
But even the £108million City bid isn't good enough for Abramovich's stubborn head. The apparently tightfisted Russian billionaire won't spare Luiz Felipe Scolari a penny for the January transfer season.
Quick Transfer News
Arsenal are set to complete a £12million deal for Andrei Arshavin. Meanwhile The Gunners want to re-sign Matthew Upson from West Ham and have reportedly made a £12m bid.
Tottenham are interested in signing Stephen Hunt, Aston Villa are reportedly lining a £14m bid for Spurs striker Darren Bent, Fulham are interested in Nurnberg striker Angelos Charisteas and Spurs have signed Wigan's Wilson Palacios.