Sign up or login to track your favorite teams

Sign Up for Bleacher Report

As a registered user you can subscribe to your favorite teams, post comments, write your own articles, and much more.

You must register in order for that functionality to work!








Validating sign up form ...

Bleacher Report articles are written by fans like you

Do you want to cover your favorite sports, teams, and leagues?

Processing writing preferences ...

Great, , you're signed up!

i.e. Big 10, LeBron James, USC Football

Selected Tags:

Logging in ...

Today, the Oakland Athletics announced that they have agreed to a one-year contract worth 5.25 million dollars with former AL MVP award winner Jason Giambi, seven years after he began a dangerous ...

After Seven-Year Mission To Destroy Yankees, Giambi Returns Home To Oakland

by The Sports Comedian [HUMOR]

0

326 reads

Humor

January 08, 2009


Today, the Oakland Athletics announced that they have agreed to a one-year contract worth 5.25 million dollars with former AL MVP award winner Jason Giambi, seven years after he began a dangerous undercover mission to destroy the New York Yankees proud franchise.

The A's welcomed Giambi back their favorite son and late '90s offensive standout with open arms after he finally was able to get the Yankees when they did not make the playoffs his journey was complete. The Yankees franchise is now garbage even with the recent signings. 

Giambi started his time with New York playing as he had when he was in Oakland, earning their trust with his big power numbers. In his third year he began his hidden agenda to bring down the Yanks with a horrendous batting average, high strike-out rate, repeated injuries, and crippling salary.

The A's sent him on this mission when they found out they could not beat the Yankees in straight-up playoff competition, so they decided to destroy them from within by sending one of their best players on this mission.

"I am just glad to be home," said Giambi in a press conference announcing the deal. "It has been a grueling undercover mission in New York."

Giambi mentioned that high prices for residencies in the Big Apple made the experience that much worse.

"Did you know you can't even find a house in the city? You have to live in a 3000 square foot condo overlooking some park," he said. "It was awful. Plus, I was only getting about $26 million a year in per diem. I was barely getting by on that scratch!"

Now back to where he calls home, Giambi spoke about what it was like when he returned to Oakland.

"I got home last night and had sex with my wife instead of a random 19-year-old I met at a downtown club," he said. "I had a meal other than the horrible lobster and steak they serve in every restaurant there, and I even went to a Wal-Mart! It wasa wonderful experice. My next stop is the In-N-Out Burger." 

Track this Article on My B/R
Flag This Article
Share This Article

0 commentsLeave a Comment

Leave a Comment

  • You must register to post a comment.

  • Asylum

    Want to write for Bleacher Report

    We are a community of fans who write about sports. And we're growing.

    Learn More and Sign Up »



    Certain photos copyright © 2009 by Getty Images.
    Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Getty Images is strictly prohibited.