Metta World Peace: 5 Names That Better Describe the Los Angeles Lakers Forward

Joshua SextonSenior Analyst IIApril 8, 2017

Metta World Peace: 5 Names That Better Describe the Los Angeles Lakers Forward

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    It's still taking some getting used to the fact Ron Artest changed his name to Metta World Peace. I still refer to him as “Artest” while watching the Los Angeles Lakers on television and accidentally type his old namesake while writing an article.

    But I can’t help but think, despite World Peace being much more peaceful than he was earlier in his career, that there are more suitable alternate names for the artist formerly known as Ron Artest.

    Here are five alternate names that better describe World Peace.

5. Sir Flex-a-Lot

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    Metta World Peace is having a hard time finding his groove so far this season. He's having the worst season of his 13-year career, including his usually dominant defense looking very average.

    But in happier, more successful times, World Peace would usually celebrate a big basket or a good defensive play by looking to the crowd, flexing his biceps and planting a big kiss on each one.

    Fans hope they see more smooching and less stinking from their small forward going forward.

    Photo courtesy of: lakers.topbuzz.com

4. Monotonous World Peace

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    In a recent interview, Metta World Peace told reporters his declining defense can largely be blamed on overall boredom.

    Here is what World Peace had to say, courtesy of The Los Angeles Times: "I got bored with defense because it was so easy for me to stop people over the years," World Peace said after Thursday's practice. "I just got bored with it.”

    While Kobe Bryant claimed he knew where World Peace was coming from with his bold statement, I think it’s easier to blame his age and lack of being in shape to start the season on his underwhelming defense.

3. The Roach Whisperer

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    During an interview yesterday, Metta World Peace had this to say about roaches, of all things:

    I’d wake up, they’d wake up in my cereal. They’d wake up like, you know, just Ron what’s up, good morning. One leg in my macaroni, the other leg in my corn. They just made themselves comfortable at my home.

    What makes this all the more knee-slapping funny is the fact World Peace was originally asked about the Los Angeles Lakers’ upcoming six-game road trip.

    But does it surprise anyone he provided an answer not at all relevant to the question asked? Of course not.

2. The Scalene Triangle

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    For all of us non-math majors out there, a scalene triangle is a triangle in which no sides are equal.

    To say Metta World Peace struggled to find his niche in Phil Jackson’s triangle offense would be an understatement. In the two years World Peace ran the offense under Jackson, he often looked lost and unsure of himself. It seemed as though the only thing World Peace felt comfortable doing was jacking up ill-advised three-pointers.

    I have dubbed World Peace “scalene,” for his all-around unequal performance running Jackson's famous offense.

1. Metta World Tweet

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    Metta World Peace kept NBA fans in stitches during the lockout with funny—head-scratching, for that matter—tweets.

    Some of his best ones included tweeting the lockout had ended a month and a half before it actually did, and challenging Michael Jordan to a game of one-on-one to end the aforementioned lockout.

    World Peace is proof how much hilarity and damage one unique mind can create using 140 characters or less.